


alchemy.

by Vioius



Category: Sdorica: Sunset (Video Game)
Genre: But pretty close, M/M, Questionable Consent, crackhead behavior, i dont know whats going on, im a joke, intentionally unfinished, maybe underaged, not exactly canon, revival baby, sexy fun times, sketchy ass hell guys, this story is a joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:34:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23695522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vioius/pseuds/Vioius
Summary: The line between life and death couldn't possibly be where a soul can exist... right?
Relationships: Charle Ceres/Morris Dietrich
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Me: hey wouldn't it be funny if-  
> Also me: no absolutely not, not again dear god
> 
> The me from last spring wrote this. The me now thought it's decent enough to be presentable lmfao. i kept everything exactly how I had it from a year ago, although I did go back and fix some of the grammar. (I have the habit of only writing when it's 2 a.m., my power hours.)
> 
> I'm pretty the date for this draft is a couple days after 'Partners' was released, and I didn't have much information, so some of the stuff you see here isn't quite accurate. Just roll with it. It's a joke. 
> 
> Me, I'm the joke. :^ )

**(Gotthold pov, because why not? He dies anyways lmao)**

“What the actual  _ fuck _ is he talking about?” The girl besides me muttered.

“Annie! That’s not something you say out loud.” Her friend shushed her. 

“I mean, I think we can all agree that the only two people who understand what any of this rune shit means is Clovis and the professor himself.” I butted into their conversation. 

What? We’re classmates, aren’t we? 

“Hold on, you mean that old dude is an  _ apprentice _ ? Damn, he looks like he could be the headmaster’s dad.” Annie muttered. 

“Annie… that’s Clovis, he’s our classmate.” Betty pointed out, but Annie continues to poke fun at Clovis’s less than average appearance. 

“It only means we have the next millennium to get a hold of this, but until professor Diebitch gets his shit together we’re all probably gonna end up like Clovis or whatever, old and talentless.”

Professor Dietrich chucked the chalk in our general direction, and it hit Betty square in the face. Poor girl, she was only trying to quench the fire. “ **Talk shit, get hit fuckers.** ” He sent one of his magical wires to retrieve the chalk. “Maybe if you’d shut the hell up my knowledge might diffuse into your little brains.” 

“That’s not how diffusion works, professor.” Clovis said, loud enough for the whole class to hear in that sarcastic voice of his. If he weren’t Dietrich’s apprentice, he’d surely be dead by now.

“A  _ joke _ , Clovis, hop off. And here, I was considering reminding them how you are the best student in the academy since Annie and Betty don’t seem to think so.” 

Annie snorted, and Betty, oh poor, poor Betty, rushed to the infirmary. Before exiting, she turned and shouted at the top of her lungs, “You… _you’re gonna get it today, professor._ **You’re really gonna get fucked today**.” She stormed out. 

“Dumb whore.” Dietrich said under his breath at a pathetic attempt to keep his composure. 

“You’re completely right, professor.” Clovis goes, “it doesn’t take a big brain to tell that you’re a sad virgin. You’re not getting fucked  _ any  _ day, sorry.” 

“Class dismissed.” 

_ OOH SHIT. that must’ve hit home. Good one Clovis! _

No questions about it. I’m getting my ass out. Though, I do wonder who’d be top. Annie glanced at me, and as if reading my very thoughts, said, “If you're wondering, Diebitch is the dominant bottom type. That stringwork is the perfect bondage mater—”

“I think it’s best if you kept your mouth shut. Betty busted her head open because of you, and I'm not trying to fail this class.” I pushed her a considerable distance away and carried on as if she were a stranger invading my personal space. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I disagree with you, but if I have to retake that damned class, I’m pulling the trigger on myself.”

She smirked and walked in the direction of the infirmary. “I personally think we chose the right major. Diebitch’s method of teaching is absolute horse shit but I think professor Ceres’s personality is bland. You don’t get this type of humor in Applied Magic.” 

_ This hoe— the aucity…. _

There weren’t many students dismissed early, and we were the only ones heading towards the infirmary. It wouldn’t hurt to gossip just this once. I caught up to her. “I don’t know how you girls think, but the way I see it is pretty straightforward. Professor Dietrich is a prodigy, Annie. He’s only a few years older than us, but he’s centuries worth of experience above us, and—”

“Oh save the pillow talk, pretty boy!” she laughed. “Yeah he’s a prodigy or whatever, but you know what else he is? Hot. Pretty fucking hot, I’m not going to lie. I’d let him have my children if he weren’t such a total dickhead,” she surveyed the area before continuing, “and I’m pretty sure he’s gay anyways. My gaydar always rings true.”

“What does that even mean? Why’re you saying such vulgar things—” /g

“Because when we’re not in class, we don’t have to talk like sages. I’m just acting my age. You should too.” /a

“I can’t. I still have dignity.” /g

She rolled her eyes. “Besides, it’s my nature, seeing things like that. I know you think this way too. I can see right through your facade.” 

_ Oh shit, abort mission. _

“I’m just kidding, Gotthold. I’ve been in your class since we were young, obviously I'd know you. You want to be like him, great and knowledgeable, I get it, but around me it’s okay to kick it to the curb.” Annie said, not once looking at me. 

How sincere my ass. 

“Come on! Laugh a little! You might end up like, ah... his name was Clovis, right?  _ You do  _ **_not_ ** _ want to end up like that guy _ .” 

Man, Clovis doesn’t deserve all this disrespect. He gets us out early nearly every other day. I corrected her, “I want to be like Professor Ceres, actually, and not be called a  _ dickhead  _ behind my back. You can’t seriously think I'm nearly as conceited as Professor Dietrich?” 

“There’s plenty of other professors at this academy but you’ve got eyes for Professor Ceres? Nice one. He’s as dense as the ocean, good luck.” She snorted again. What kind of girl snorts when she laughs? Annie is undoubtedly a pig hiding in magic. 

“That’s not what I— no you know what, we’re here, the infirmary. You can fuck off now.” I knew talking to people like her was a bad idea. 

“Uhm~ It was you who decided to tag along but whatever, now I know.” I could  _ feel _ her smirk burning into the back of my head. It took a great deal of self control not to punch her teeth in, but hey, we’re classmates, aren’t we? 

More importantly… Professor Ceres is right up ahead! What’s he doing out of class early? Well, he can’t be expected to ever give peak performance… 

We hardly know each other because I didn’t major in Applied Magics. Yes, I know, that was my life’s biggest mistake, but I’m trying to switch. Alright, day 7 of begging for attention.

**(insert unimportant dialogue here. Sorry i’m not here for gotthold anyways but if you really want to know what they said, i do a fine job at summarizing:**

**“Hi.” /G**

**“Heyyy— why do you look like shit?” /C**

**“Dietrich can’t teach worth shit, that’s why.” /G**

**“Typical.” /C**

**“Huh, what’s that over there?” /G**

**that’s the prologue lmao.)**


	2. chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: inconsistent third person pov, not because it symbolizes something but because i’m too lazy to keep italicizing their thoughts. Is it even chapter 1 yet? Idfk lmao i’m beating around the bush. Also btw i know like 1% of geography and exposition so don’t come at me for this. Press ctrl+F and type “biggabum” to skip flashback but ur missing out, just sayin

Charle abandoned the explorer’s life and accepted the professor role 7 years ago. Why would he give up traveling the world and sightseeing to travel from his classroom to his lab and seeing the same faces day after day? If any student were to ask, they’d be met with the same answer: “ _ I encountered someone. Never again _ .” 

_ [ a flashback that nobody needed begins here from charle sp’s memory uwu it’s not important but if you squint you’ll see… nothing or you can just skip the whole flashback that’s okay too ] _

Atlas Ruins. 

Pretty? Yeah. 

Dangerous?  _ Extremely _ . 

And that’s exactly why young Charle was so drawn towards it. There’s always a corner he hasn’t mapped yet, and he was stubbornly determined to see it all. The creatures that infest this place didn’t bother him. He could just  _ look  _ at one, and it would combust.

So what exactly scarred him so much?

While wandering this place for the nth time, he’d run into a little boy, 9 at most; although, Charle’s judgment was notorious for being  **terribly** inaccurate. He was a snappy kid who never ceased to poke fun at Charle’s age. Mind you, Charle had just begun his prime, the golden 20’s. It was a crippling blow to his pride. 

In retaliation, Charle would poke fun at the boy’s hobby: knitting.

_‘Who the hell knits anyways?_ _In the middle of the Atlas fucking Ruins? Where are your parents? Not that I’m concerned about your safety, but that someone needs to smack some sense into them_.’ He was _this_ close to blowing a fuse, but when he turned around, the kid was gone. Charle didn’t think twice of it. His parents probably came to scold him about speaking to strangers. 

‘ _ Serves him right _ .’ 

It would be two more runs until they met again. “Look, if I show you a magic trick would you stop following me? It isn’t safe here.” What? He’s like 9. Charle could dangle some keys and the brat would be satisfied. 

“Just because I’m shorter than you doesn’t mean you should look down on me!” 

“Uh, yeah,  _ it kinda does.” _

Charle tested his luck and crouched to his height, and the boy had the audacity to slap him across the face before wrapping a blanket around his head. “Say thanks.”

“Thanks for what?” He was incredulous, caressing his face. “Your blankie? A rejected cape? Breaking my jaw?” Charle took it off his shoulders and held it out as if it were diseased. “I don’t need any more layers to slow me down.”

“ _ What  _ layers _?  _ You’re blaming your languidity on your clothes? You aren’t wearing anything idiot!  _ Youmightaswellbenaked _ .” 

“I’m sorry what?”

He sighed, activating his ultimate trap card: being a little kid. “Forget it, you ungrateful dunce. If you don’t want it just throw it out. I made it according to your color scheme. White doesn’t suit me anyways.”

Ok nevermind, this child came from Satan’s asshole.

“You made it?  _ You _ ? Made  _ this _ ?” 

“Do I have to repeat myself?  _ Yes, _ I made it!” He said. “Figured you’d be cold but jokes on me, you’ve got  _ magic  _ up your sleeve.”

Charle heard a small sniff and panicked. He didn’t like the kid, but he didn’t like seeing him cry either. That would look bad on his resume. “Hey, are you crying? Don’t cry—”

“Shut up. I don’t cry. I have a cold. Do you not see where we are?” He turned around and glared, do you understand,  _ glared _ . Little boys are supposed to have puppy eyes so is he defected or what? “I used all my material on you, and this is the thanks I get. Ugh!” 

‘ _ Is he… guilt tripping me or throwing a fit?’ _ Charle scoffed. “I’m a stranger, kid. You should’ve made this for yourself or your parents or, oh I don’t know, literally anybody else.” He tried to give it back but the kid crossed his arms, really testing his patience. ‘ _ I’m about to show him the trick where I disappear _ .’ 

“What do you mean  _ anybody else _ ? No one’s stupid enough to come by here. You want me to adopt one of those puppets and drape a blanket around them?  _ Don’t be ridiculous. _ I’m trying to do something nice. Can’t you just accept it?” 

Well, yeah, he can. He’s quite cold himself to be honest, but he chose to be stubborn. What? The kid’s a brat. Does he even know what  _ being nice _ is? “I’m an explorer doing my  _ job _ . Yours is to return to your parents so they don’t have to risk their lives fetching you. The only reason I haven’t ditched you yet is because if you die, I’m held accountable.” 

“Accountable?” He laughed. “Are you assuming I  _ have  _ parents?  _ Nobody _ comes here. I was left, but I’ve made a living so that’s why I stayed.  _ You’re  _ the one entering  _ my  _ domain, and the reason you keep coming back is because you don’t know this place inside and out, huh? I  _ do. _ But you’re too ignorant to ask for my help because I’m a kid, isn’t that right? SoI’m trying to reach out to you myself but you’re a just a—.” His voice cracked. 

Gee, maybe he’s not 9 after all. 

‘ _ He’s about to cry. Uh-oh, code red. _ ’ Charle felt awkward so he did what he does best and made the situation worse. “So you’re doing all of this because you’re lonely? If it makes you feel any better I’ll take your gift.” 

“If you ever have children, you’re fucked.” 

See? He’s back to normal, perfectly executed Charle!

**(charle pov, not a time jump just me being inconsistent)**

“Ahem, anyway, show me some spots since you’re so sure I haven’t seen then. Enlighten me, little genius.” He raised an eyebrow, not believing my request until I reached my hand out. 

“If you insist,” He took my hand and strings wrapped around us, connecting our forearms. Did I just make a death wish? He’s 9—no, 13? C’mon the kids gotta be 14 at most… maybe he moisturizes… This is nothing I can’t handle. 

“If you let go of my hand, you might just die.” 

“Understood. “

WIth that, we were off grappling in the northwest direction. He’s not shooting webs from his hands, no, sadly he’s not a spider demihuman. I got my hopes up there. He’s just using string, neverending string. 

We crash landed into a hole of a wrecked ship. Okay, I’m lying; he caught himself but I tripped over him. I tuned out the old man remark I expected to come. “So where are we?”

“My living space. The whole ship’s mine but I never look where there is no light.”

“Is it because there are monsters lurking in the dark and you are in constant fear—”

“No because I can’t see in the dark dumbass. I dice those things for fun.”

There are so many questions I have for him but his personality makes me want to shoot him. “So back to what you said, you just found yourself here when you woke up one day?” 

“Basically.”

“And you don’t remember your past?”

“I do. I just don’t want to talk about it.”

“Right, right so what do you eat?” 

“The stuff your clumsy ass drops every time you pass by. That and I hunt when I’m  _ really  _ starving.” 

“You sleep here? Completely vulnerable?”

“You’re looking down on me again.”

“Sorry. This rope-string-wire thing. What is it? Do you knit with this? How can you say you run out of material if it’s never-ending? Is this why you like knitting?—”

He shoved a finger to my mouth. “Damn, you’re annoying.  _ No  _ I don’t knit with this string.  _ No _ I don’t like knitting at all. It was a coverup. I was playing innocent so you’d give me some food but you’re really,  _ really _ dumb. The string is magic.”

“ **_You know magic_ ** ?” He’s 13! No way, what if he’s from an epic? “The Lost Prodigy”? Oh man, I’ve struck gold. “What? Which type? From who? How much?”

“If you ask more than one question at a time again I won’t talk to you anymore.” Pft, he’s bluffing, but I guess he’s right. I must be overwhelming him. “Would you believe me if I told you I’m a natural born genius of life magic?”

“No, not really. But I’m willing to change my mind. You’re saying this string is your soul energy?” 

“Yes.”

“Show me a trick then genius.”

He rolled his eyes and weaved the string around his own wrist. I didn’t know he was into self harm… but if what he says is true then there’s nothing I should be worried about. But still, he’s losing a  _ lot  _ of blood. Okay, I’m a little worried. I haven’t looked too hard into life magic so I wouldn’t know how to heal a wound  _ that  _ fatal. We’ll have to stop the bleeding manually.

“I can hear your thoughts and they’re pissing me off. You asked for this and you’re not even watching.” He retracted the strings, deepening the cuts on himself. I looked away before the blood splattered. 

This is some pagan ritual type shit. 

This is the summoning of a demon. 

This is sadism  _ and  _ masochism. 

“ _ Look, _ idiot. All healed. It’s nothing really. You should see me when I—”

“No, no I believe you.” I threw him my bag. “Eat up and then we’ll use my Owlboy to do some mapping of this ship, yeah?”

“I’ve literally cursed in every other sentence but you insist on talking to me like I’m a toddler. Why are you  _ so _ annoying?”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

It was quite fun. I never knew there were rune carvings on the underside of this ship. Some rocks with ancient carvings were hidden under the wreck as well. Not that either of us could read them but they were cool to look at. He was able to translate some of the writings and perform a cool life magic trick with them. Was it useful? No, but it’s the passion that counts! We ran into some monsters deep into the wreck, and I was relieved to see that the kid stayed true to his word and diced his side while I blew up mine.

“Hey! Be careful with your explosions! If this place collapses, you’re  **dead** to me.” 

“Sorry, sorry! Owlboy has a mind of his own sometimes.”

“It’s alive?”

“No, and that’s the way it should be.”

“Say, you think life magic can ever reach the point to where it can give life to inanimate things?”

“It would be amazing, but sadly no.”

“Then I’ll be the one to do it! Mark my words!”

“Haha, have you ever considered registering for the rune academy then? It’s where I study Applied Magic.”

“Hmm, maybe when I’m older. I don’t want to leave this place just yet. You… will wait for me, will you? You won’t be dead by the time I turn up?

“With geniuses like you running the Life Magic field? Death is a fairytale.” 

He laughed. Strange. He hasn’t laughed until now. It was kinda cute— solely because he’s a kid of course. I’m not some kind of pervert. “Geniuses like me, you say? You’re wrong. I’m unmatched. Don’t get it twisted.” 

“Whatever floats your boat.”

It was getting dark. I had to return to the academy. “You sure you’d be safe here?” I said as he led me back to where we had first met. 

“Stop. Looking. Down. On. Me.” He half-shouted at me. “Go. Leave.”

“Hey, wait! You’re so eager to get rid of me, geez.” I gave him a maroon colored notebook. “Just a memory book for you, until we meet again.”

“A diary? Do I look like a little girl to you?” 

Yeah, kinda. Small waist, thigh gap— wait, what the fuck? 

“I’m only taking it to complete our exchange. You don’t seem to trust my memory? I’ll have you know I’m capable of—”

“I’m sure you are! It’s just that when you said you didn’t want to talk about your past life, I thought maybe you could let out some steam on paper.”

“But you didn’t think to give me something to write with? Idiot.”

Oh, right. I gave him an unused pen from my collection, the cool caligraphy one I got from the East Alliance. 

Inefficient? Yeah. 

Pretty? Extremely!

I waved him goodbye, saying that I’d be back in no less than 3 days. He scoffed and left me hanging. A brat’s still a brat after all. 

**\\\timeskipbby//**

“I could get used to high speed grappling.” I said, catching myself upon landing this time. “It’s quite fun, totally different from rope swinging.” 

“Stop making useless comments. It makes me actually want to talk to you.” the boy said, disconnecting our hands and snatching his book back from my free hand. “I can’t lose focus or the both of us might just die.”

“You can heal us though, right?” I remarked absently. He gasped and did not answer. Does his life magic not cover other people? “You aren’t able to heal me?”

“Yet! I-it’s a work in progress.” I was expecting him to yell at me again, but he turned heel and led us into another adventure without a word. 

His string work was clean for someone who was only using one hand. The other held that book close. I finished my wave and blew up the rest of his as well. He whipped his head around looking offended. I knew what he was going to say. “I’m looking out for you. It’s not the same as looking down on you. Please don’t misunderstand.” 

Again, he gave me the silent treatment. These mood swings are very hard to deal with. “We’re treading on light ground. You should be careful.” I uttered. This certain area was another shipwreck but it was dead wood. If your footing slipped here, you would fall into impending death, being pierced by the jagged rocks underneath. 

“Yeah.” 

“Why are you mad at me for caring about you?” 

“I’m not mad.”

“Irritated? Upset? Annoyed? Use whatever word you want. You’re in a bad mood, and I can’t apologize if I don’t know what’s wrong.”

“Because— _ because I just am, alright? _ ”

I bit down my impatience, remembering that he was in the rebellious era of his life. “What happened in those three days that made you so cold towards me?”

He turned to me, eyes glued to the ground and fists balled. “I’m not used to human interaction. This whole ‘ _ I care about you _ ’ thing is a foreign concept. I’ll spare you the sad backstory but the reason I’m here is because  _ they lied _ . It’s a coping mechanism to be cold, or maybe the climate here is getting to my head.” 

“Oh, I’m s—”

“Shut up, I’m not done talking.” He said. “I don’t need your pity. For three days I wondered if you were still alive, and then you go and make a comment like that? I don’t  _ know  _ if I can heal others simply because I’ve never gotten the chance to. I’m not asking for you to deliberately hurt yourself so I can prove myself. If something happens to you, then I’ll lose—” He stopped. 

Charle waited,

And waited,

And waited…

Ok that’s enough waiting. He wasn’t looking for unwanted awkward eye contact in silence.

“You were saying?”

The boy shook his head, opting to continue the exploration. “nevermind.”

“ _ Nevermind? _ You know, I hate it when you do that.”  _ All that waiting for a cliffhanger? You gotta be kidding me... _ “Look, first of all, I’m fairly certain I can take care of myself. Secondly, life is a fickle concept, but death is death. You can heal all you want, but when someone dies, they die. Life magic can never cross that line. It’s just something you have to accept.” 

“That’s not what you told me three days ago.”

“It was a  _ joke _ . I was trying to make you  _ laugh _ .”

“I don’t  _ want _ to accept that. They’re just not talented enough.”

“Don’t disrespect your predecessors.”

“Is it disrespectful if it’s true?”

“ **It’s not true** .” I snapped. I yanked him by the collar and made him look at me. “You’ve never even  _ healed  _ another person, you have no right to speak that way about the academy’s professors. If you knew an ounce of Life Magic outside of yourself, then maybe you’d understand where the line is drawn.” 

“The line? And the line _ itself  _ is not a place a soul can be?” He pushed me away. “If you want to doubt me, you can. I’m just a crazy kid with big dreams, right? You’ll never believe me if I said I could defy death, right? Of course not. You’ll always,  _ always _ look down on me.” 

I sighed. Arguing with a kid… really now, Ceres? Of course I left it at that. What else was there to say? We continued on this adventure, but the atmosphere was tense. I let him pass me because I figured he needed some time to cool down. He was sulking, not crying, but  _ sulking _ . Maybe I was too harsh on him. 

“A belt.”

He looked at me with fake disinterest. “Here’s mine, to attach your book to,” I had already taken it off to wrap around him without waiting for his expected protests. “So you can fight with both hands again.”

“Thanks.” What? Am I hearing things or is he actually being grateful? “Do it for me. I don’t see a latch anywhere.” Yeah, academy uniforms are notorious for defying physics. I did as he ordered. I could feel him staring at— well the top of my head because he probably was.  **The point was that I’m uncomfortable.**

“I’m sorry for what I said, and for continually acting like a snob who constantly looks down on you. I shouldn’t have forced my thoughts onto you. I’m really, really sorry.” Throwing my pride out the window, I mustered up an apology. “Could you please just talk to me again?” I forced myself to say the cliche. 

A dent in my pride proves its worth. He hugged me, and I’ll be damned it was  _ awkward _ . He was not a person of human interaction, but  **neither am I.** I can’t even hug a woman so how am I supposed to know where to put my hands on a child— oookay, Charle, that took a wrong turn. You need to stop and relearn syntax...

“Yeah, I’m sorry for being an asshole too.”

Aww he’s apologizing. I didn’t know he was capable of— wait a minute “ _ Too?  _ **What are you saying kid** —”

“The more you speak, the less I like you.”

“You like me at all? I’m flattered.”

“To be fair, I only know one other person in this world.” 

“...Is that a yes?”

“It’s a: it would be more a pain in the ass to dislike you.”

“Such honesty, warms my heart. How much do you like me, hm? Times infinity?”

“Minus a billion per second spent breathing.”

“But you’re not denying that I started at infinity.”

“Oh  _ fuck  _ off. Ah— my bad. I don’t do well with friendships. You don’t hate me do you?”

“I could never hate a child.” I threw in a little laugh in hopes that he’d catch my drift, but he looked sadder than he did before. Maybe it’s best to let him do the healing. 

We still didn’t talk, but it was a healthy silence. “Pft, the sound of your book clacking is really killing the vibe.” Charle, what are you doing, you’re supposed to let him do the healing—

“It’s not my fault your belt is so big!”

“You’re calling me fat?”

“No, I didn’t even imply it. You called yourself fat, sorry.” 

Okay that kinda hurt, but at least I got him laughing. “Ah, I kept pushing it back, but what is your name?”

“I won’t tell you. I want it to be a surprise when I enroll into that rune academy you speak of. You’ll know it’s me when they post the rankings.”

“Tch, you really love yourself don’t you? Then I won’t tell you my name either. You’ll know it’s me because I’ll be the one on top of you— I mean, your name!— I’ll be on top of your name, like on the charts, you know...”  _ God damn it Charle. _ Good thing he didn’t catch it. He rolled his eyes and pressed on forward. 

We ran into monsters, of course. I was more concerned that the ground would shatter. “Hey, it’s no use, they’ll keep coming. Let’s go back before the ground caves in.” 

“What? No! I promised to show you everything you haven’t seen.”

“That’s not more important than your life. Come on!” 

I grabbed his hand expecting him to do the grapple thing and get us out of here, but he looked at me in disbelief. “You’re running away? How’re you going to top me like that?” Charle, now is  _ not  _ the time for you to dwell in the gutter. “Hey dumbass why’re you letting your guard down?” 

Huh?  _ Shit _ . I’ll have to save the Bible pleas for later. We’re surrounded again, but this ground cannot take another blast from Owlboy.

“I can’t grapple; they’ll just cut my wires. Let’s make a run for it.” That’s what I said…

The ground shook, but there was still a considerable distance before it would be stable again. 

“We have to take a gamble, or we’ll both fall under.” 

“Gamble? No, what are you saying? Life and death is not something you gamble with.” 

“Doubting me to the very last moments, huh?”

“Stop being pessimistic and run faster. Are you going to live up to your jabs at my old age or are you all out of energy?” 

“Do you trust me?” He stopped in his tracks to lash a wave off our tail. I answered yes absentmindedly. “Good, then, it’ll be more than 3 days until we see each other again.” His strings jammed at the frozen ground causing it to tear. “Run, idiot!” He lashed another wave away. “Now!”

“There’s still time for you to cross. Just take my hand!”

“I don’t have enough soul energy to keep this going for much longer. I said I would cover us, now get  **_out_ ** !” His wires came towards me and with incredible strength, tossed me the rest of the way to stable grounds. I could only watch from where I stood as everything collapsed, including him. 

When there was only the sound of my ragged breathing and the unrelenting wind itself, I made my way back to the tear he had created and peered underneath. The sun revealed everything I didn’t want to see. There was blood, his I’m assuming because these monsters can’t bleed. I looked as close as I could without falling in myself. There was no body. I sent Owlboy under to light up the area. Still, no body. 

I lost him. 

And it haunts me to this very day. That I never knew his name. That I couldn’t see him in the rune academy. That I couldn’t see him grow and develop. That I couldn’t give him a proper burial. That I couldn’t even protect him. I didn’t want to explore ever again after that. 

_ [ BIGGABUM FLASHBACK ENDS HERE I HOPE YOU LIKED 12 PAGES. TIME TO STOP TALKING LIKE I CAME STRAIGHT OUT OF QUEEN ELIZABETH’S ASS ] _

**//morris pov in that behind the scenes shit\\\**

Ahh, shit how long have I been dead this time? 7 years. Damn, last time it was 3. To be fair, death by hypothermia isn’t exactly hard to come back from. 

It really, truly is a blessing to be alive even if I  _ can  _ heal and resurrect myself. I’m beyond lucky that my body stayed untouched for these 7 years. If some beast were to have eaten me, my first or second death, then resurrection would be basically impossible. Soul energy is hard enough to gather as nothing more than a spirit, but losing my body means I lose all the senses that come with it, including sight, and more importantly,  **my handsome face** . 

I could put my soul energy into anything and be alive again, but if it isn’t in my fine ass body, then life isn’t worth living.

My second death was for the sake of some dude that my dumbass never learned the name of. I wonder if he still remembers me or if he’s even alive. He’s a bumbling idiot so the chances are 50/50. I slapped myself. The first thought I had during my third life was about him. 

_ If you get hurt then I’ll lose everything. _

Did I say that? That’s so…  _ embarrassing _ . No, wait, I don’t think I ever finished that sentence.  **That’s even worse** ! I died without telling him my thoughts then. And to think those were my exact thoughts from 7 years ago really highlights how much of a loser I was. He was all I thought about during those 7 dead years, sad to say. I hoped to see him again even if he couldn’t see me, but he never came back to the ruins. I guess my death left a mark on him. That’s good right? That means he didn’t forget that I die but that also means he’s convinced that I’m dead. 

_ Good grief, you moron. _

_ I just wish you were here…  _

I had erased the images of the people that surrounded me in my first life long ago, so aside from myself, he was the only person left in my mind. I remember he had short white hair and amber colored eyes— the ones that are a mix of dirt brown and piss yellow— and he always wore a punchable, goofy smile. We argued a lot, and his hands were always clammy when he held mine. Why did we hold hands? He could’ve just grabbed my waist or s— that’s a terrible idea, I take that back. 

Why am I still holding onto him? He thinks I’m dead. I’m not supposed to come into contact with people who think that. It’s too complicated a plothole. And besides he only knew me for how long? A few days? Even if he’s alive he’s probably happily married to some Tits Mcgee. 

I need to forget about him.

_ You don’t want to forget about him _ .

For now, I’ll forget about him.

_ Acceptable _ .

I looked up at the sun peering in from the hole in the shipwreck. The remains of the monsters I brought down with me were scattered, also untouched. I didn’t land on a jagged rock, thank God, but there was dried blood all over and around me. I must’ve died on impact. Everything really had been untouched. My soul energy was low, but I took a risk and shot a wire out into the air in hopes that it would latch onto something. I felt the connection to a metal post. Today’s just my lucky day isn’t it? I booked it the hell outta there and towards the blinding sun. It was still cold though, exactly how I’d remembered. This place has been my home for 10 years. The soul energy here was enormous, but it wasn’t enough for a fast revival.

The first thing on my to-do list was to see how I looked. From 10 years to 13 years of age wasn’t a noticeable difference, but 7 years… I’ve just reached my golden 20s! Unless a bird projectile shitted on me while I was dead, I should be bangin’. I doubt there are any birds wandering about this deep into Atlas anyway. 

Yes, I'm narcissistic, but after seeing my reflection, how could I not be? Words can’t capture a percent of my beauty. If I could get some substance in me, I'd be perfect. But alas, I got bored of checking myself out. 

Step two: huh I’ve never thought it out this far. I’m an adult now which makes a world of difference to what step two typically is. I thought of my old dreams.

_ To get married to a Tits Mcgee myself. _ Yeah, no thanks. Puberty really makes you horny, damn. 

_ To get out of the ruins and build a house in a quiet place. _ That’s a waste of my talent.

_ To apply in the rune academy and show them who’s the baddest bitch _ . Oh, right. I made that promise with the nameless dude. It couldn’t hurt to check if he stayed true, right? I’m getting bored of these exploring the same ruins anyways. 

Strange. I’m feeling oddly inspired to go show everyone who’s the baddest bitch. Maybe it’s the calling to give my life purpose. Maybe I’m just conceited. 50/50.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol it gets worse from here buckle up babes


	3. chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Into the unknOOOooOOOown, into the unknnnnnnooooOOOOOOOWN
> 
> a.k.a. Morris steps into civilization and not the fucking wilds like he's been living in for the past ??? years idk they keep changing his age.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: still not present day but we’re GETTING THERE OKAY I GOTTA DEVELOP THE GAY WIZARDS FROM THE VERY BASE THEY CANT JUST FALL IN LOVE. IT DOESNT but it should and im not complaining if it did WORK LIKE THAT

**(still morris pov)**

This proved to be a terrible idea.

You know, Dietrich, you may have book smarts, but it’s the common sense that gets you.

I’ve never been outside of the ruins so it was a given that I’d be aimlessly walking forward. Until someone tells me where the fuck I’m going, I’ll just keep walking straight. It was my rock-bottom plan. 

A long ass way from the ruins is where long grasses grew, and finally, first sign of civilization.

Did I look presentable? No. I probably smell like ass too, but hopefully I could still charm the common folk. What am I saying? They don’t look any better and they _haven’t_ been dead for 7 years. It’s an insult to myself to say I'll fit right in.

Fortunately I reached a pond before anyone could spot me. The shirt that I wore ever since my parents left me to die was uncomfortably tight, but it’s too chilly to take it off. And besides, i haven’t eaten anything. It would be best to keep my clothes on. But my pants were a different story. They were ripped and torn beyond function, and honestly why the hell did I keep them on for this long anyways?

My dignity. If I had taken them off, I could be riding the wind but I don't want my pride and joy flopping about for  _ any _ eyes to see. To say that spot was  _ tight _ was an understatement. It won’t kill me but it’s not an injury I can use magic to heal.I had to call code blue and deal with myself plenty of times and I'll be  _ damned _ if a living soul saw me doing such a thing. 

Lastly, the belt that guy gave me, with the book still attached, wrapped around me. Pretty useless. Writing is the last thing on my mind. The belt proved no obstacle. My waist had not grown into it.  _ Maybe he was more rotund than I had remembered? _

I stripped down to bathe. The first real bath in 10 years. What? I wasn’t going to bathe in the waters of the ruins to die of hypothermia again. I wondered if I could still knit using my magic strings. The expertise was still there but the soul energy was lacking. 

Fuck it. I could be knocked out cold for a whole week if it meant I could make myself a new pair of goddamn pants. I got to work, but frequently stopped to push bangs back. Surprisingly, my hair didn’t grow much in those 7 years, but it was unbelievably disastrous. Upon finishing the pants, I continued showering in glory. But when getting out of the pond, I flopped over, a literal fish out of water. My feet burned from the little cuts I'd got from discarding my shoes and I couldn’t heal them, having used my soul energy on the new pair of pants. My legs refused to move after days of nonstop walking. My body’s screaming for rest, a nap at least, but I was  _ this  _ close to civilization. I’ll have to carry on even if I must crawl and roll my way to where I need to be.

I used my old rag of a shirt to dry myself and tossed it by the pond. That thing was impossible to get off and to hell with putting it back on. My new pants were basic and quite hideous to say the least, but a charmer like myself will make do. I kept the belt, though oversized, around my waist. It’s far fetched, but if he happens to spot it, we’ll be reunited. 

_ Damn, I barely knew the guy. This is a borderline obsession, Dietrich. _

I pushed that thought back. It’s a  _ little  _ unhealthy, yeah, but that guy’s one hell of a motivation. I’d never thought I’d step foot out of the ruins, and yet here I stand.

A gust of wind snapped me out of my anime shounen reverie. Is it just cold everywhere on this damn continent? A shirt would be nice, but the rest of my soul energy needs to be conserved more important things, like playing nomad. 

There were prairie sheep here and there, but I didn’t have the heart to slay them. Never ate much in the past, so living on grass and water wouldn’t be much of an inconvenience. The fruits here, goodness I haven’t seen ripe fruit in literal decades! I assumed them to be edible, but it wouldn’t surprise me if they gave me the shits in a few hours. 

Oh… karma you’re too good to me. This shit is delicious—

I consumed more fruit than a monkey in the wilds, rather savagely as a matter of fact. I could live off of this. I could build a house right here in this quiet place right now if I wanted to. This is the chance the universe has given me to start over completely.

But the calling wouldn’t leave me alone. 

And finally after a fat nap and more miscellaneous fruit, I picked up the sticks and approached the villagers. They didn’t receive me well, most of them being too prissy or sensitive to handle my attitude, but it didn’t matter. The few ladies I had wrapped around my fingers fed me well and provided me a place to sleep. My one complaint is that they kept hovering about my door as if expecting me to invite them in. Sorry ladies, I’m sleep deprived and malnourished. Getting frisky is the last thing on my mind.

A seemingly less unattractive lady approached me and asked me about my soul energy. Apparently she can see it and is a student at the magic academy, which I assume to be another name for  _ rune academy _ . I showed a couple tricks with my best ‘ _ fuck off _ ’ expression but she wasn’t catching the drift. Well, it would be a little too cruel to mistreat your caretaker… Not wanting to blow my cool-guy swagger— or get kicked out— I kept her at a distance and made her my play-apprentice. She told me she was interested in life magic. Now  _ that  _ got the conversation going. Though, to say it was a pleasant experience would be a blatant lie, but for as long as I had clothes to wear, food to eat, and a roof over my head, I could put up with a bonobo.

She lent me books to study while I recovered. Admittingly, I wasn't the kindest to her, but we got along. When my soul energy reached a sustainable amount, it was time to say our goodbyes. Again, I never asked her name, nor revealed mine, opting to tell her some made up name like fucking _Malorn._ I told her that I would be leaving so I wasn't looking for attachment, but if she were truly a student at the academy we would meet again. It came out more like an insult than promising or reassuring. Even so, I hoped that she hadn’t been lying to me the whole time just for attention. I could even say we were friends...

I thanked her generosity with a kiss on the hand. **A grave mistake, really**. I got instantaneously jumped and swarmed by the common folk, who had nothing to do with me before. That’s fake as hell, guys. I didn’t need to know about your secret ‘outsider aesthetics’ kink. My female friend pulled a 180 and got lost in the crowd like a useless piece of driftwood in a river, not even attempting to stand up for me. Sheesh, so much for being friends.

For quite some time, I couldn’t move. People were shoving goodbye gifts to my face as if they were seeing me off to the next chapter of my life or something. All this stuff would be nice, but my bag isn’t Narnia. I can’t keep all this garbage.

“Haven’t you people heard of stranger danger?” I said, declining yet another gift from an older woman. It was literally plastic wrapped ham, I’m good thank you. “Please, I have to go—”

And somehow she manages to slip it into my pocket. Ah fuck it, I've come to learn that common folk are unconventionally superhuman. If  _ you  _ were surrounded by mostly heavy-set middle-aged  _ sharks,  _ just give up. I closed my eyes and stayed in place hoping they’d get bored and leave me alone. 

Most of them got the gist, God bless, but the others got a little touchy. Well, I don’t mind a little fanserv— I felt hands grabbing at my belt.  _ Ok, that’s the last straw. _ I worked too long and too hard on these fucking pants for you rabid hyenas to tear at them. 

_ I swear on everything if the next hand that feels up on my chest is clammy I’m going to roundhouse kick all of you and take off into the sunset _ . 

Lo and behold, it was.

And I did. 

I flipped all of them off and grappled my way out before any other mobs, angry, horny, or both could swarm me again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahaha these author's notes at the beginning of every chapter are logs to my old friend. i had originally written this shitshow for her, and i'm not just talking to myself i swear—


	4. chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Balzac is one notorious headmaster. Hands down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need sleep. 
> 
> realistically i need help lmao, but for now all i ask for is SLEEP.

**(you already know this finna be morris pov again :)**

“No, you don’t understand, I want to enroll as a  _ student _ .” I insisted.

“Now, now, don’t catch an attitude. It’s academy rules for all students to have documentation. We cannot trust that they aren’t some type of espionage otherwise.” Headmaster Balzac said, “but your determination interests me. You say you’re a natural born genius in life magic? Why don’t you become a professor? There are no regulations for that role, only pure skill.”

“You want a display of strength, don’t you headmaster?” I rubbed my temples. “Just tell me sooner next time.”

“Hold your horses! It’ll be a simulation battle so no one gets hurt. That is the single most important rule of the academy.” I waved him off and waited for the simulation to begin. Fighting the old fart was a waste of time. I could tell he was half-assing every move, opting to slap the shield button every time I even  _ thought _ about going offensive. He’s purposefully giving me the spotlight. I did some fancy string work, not really seeing a point in this test. 

“Oh I get it! You specialize in contemporary dancing! We have a class for that.”

“You said what—”

This old man’s playing with me. For sure. And then he just blasts me for 999999999 damage like how’s that even possible???

The headmaster applauded my performance. “Haha! Young ambition, I love that. You’ve got impressive dexterity. Tenacity and defense, not so much. Very flash, but very inefficient with mana.” 

“I’m what?” Flashy? He thinks some green lines are flashy? He pulls out a fucking laser lightshow on me and  _ I’m  _ the flashy one? Good thing we don’t have epilepsy… 

_ More importantly _ , I don’t use mana… 

“You’re hired as an assistant professor for now. Just refine a few things and you’ll have your own class in no time.”

“Yes sir. Excuse me, I’ll be on my way.” 

I’ve gotta be honest with myself. As much as I love me, does Balzac not see that I’m  _ clearly  _ unqualified for this position? Why are there less restrictions for professors than students in the first place? **Safety my ass.** I would have loved to assert my superiority over the other students  _ as  _ a student. Doing so as a professor isn’t as fun… 

Those poor souls. As if that hard work bullshit is getting them anywhere. Doing something wrong and working harder on it only makes you wrong _and_ _tired_.

Say, wasn’t that nameless guy a student here? 

_That was 7 years ago, there’s no chance he’d still be studying here. Stop getting your hopes up, idiot, you’re getting distracted from your true goal of showing everyone who’s the baddest bitch._ _The headmaster gave you an advantage, not that you needed it of course, quit reminiscing about the past and_ ** _live_** _._

The sun had set, and the headmaster called me up and out of my studying to tell me about a mini-banquet he’s throwing for my arrival. He tells me to improve but goes and throws a party expecting me to be there. I feel like the old man is doing this to rub it in that no one cares enough to show up. I was tempted not to go myself, but the thought of him sitting alone at the dinner table drunk and crying made me pity him.

Surely enough it was just the two of us there. I’m a  _ little _ disappointed but not surprised. Who would stay overtime unless they absolutely had to? It’s fine, when I top the charts, they’ll come crawling. “Well, this is tragic. More people showed up the last time I threw one, for Professor Ceres, that is. Maybe it was because he was the best student in the academy prior to.” 

Wow way to remind me that I have no friends. 

The headmaster handed me a plate of cake. “I made it out of love and warm welcomings!”  _ Well I’m not sure I want to eat it anymore _ . “Cooking can set off a world of magic inside you, requiring not a single spell to be cast.” 

“Cooking? When you put it like that, it sounds amazing. Sure, I’ll study it during my free time.” 

“Silly you, who said you’d have free time?”

“Huh?”

“You should focus purely on improvement. You are juggling the life of a student and professor, which, by the way,  **_stays between us_ ** .”

An academy of secrets, huh, I’m liking this… 

There was a knock on the door accompanied by a bright smile. “Headmaster! Sorry I’m late, I got stuck on deciding which gift I should bring.” The newcomer had long white hair, like a mop really, and wore an intricate system of layers, garments, and drapes. He glanced back and forth between me and the headmaster. “My mistake, did the banquet not start yet? I didn’t know you made it open to students this time.”

“Ceres! I knew I could count on you to show up!” Balzac grinned in that precious old man style even I can’t get mad at. He slapped me on the back and because I’m still literally malnourished, that shit  _ hurt _ . “You’re lookin’ at ‘m: Professor Dietrich, the youngest in our academy. Your record has been broken!”

“Oh, my bad for assuming. I wasn’t expecting such a young face.” 

“Nobody does. I was hoping to use that as a selling point, but the other professors are in their later years. I can’t rely on them anymore now that they’re starting to fossilize.” 

No disrespect sir, but I think  _ you’re  _ starting to fossilize. I studied this  _ Ceres _ guy. He let out a chuckle at the headmaster’s comment but immediately shut up when he met my eyes. He avoided eye contact, eyes darting anywhere else. 

Am I delusional or do his eyes look familiar?

The professor cleared his throat, catching both our attention. “No matter! You’re all the life this party needs. I fixed an excess amount of food; let me go fetch it real quick. Carry on mingling you two!”

I mean, I get that he’s old, but do old people really speak like that nowadays? It’s been too long since I’ve come in contact with them. 

“So… how’d you do it? How’d you break my record?” He sat across from me and initiated in unwanted chatter.

“You were the academy’s best student before becoming a professor, right? Does that make you the best professor?” I asked bluntly. 

“Err, I’m honored that you think so, but I do not think that’s true.”

“Then, tell me who’s the top student now.”

“It’s different for each field. There are multiple ‘best’ students.”

“That defeats the purpose.” I said. “If you’re dying to know, it’s solely because I’m better than you, hate to see it happen.” I took out my book and pen, a new pen because the calligraphy one sucked actual ass, and pretended to be absorbed in my work.

“I got you a gift.” 

“Don’t need it.” I muttered, flipping through pages of information I copied. It stuck the first time I read it, but it wouldn’t hurt to keep a copy of the basics.

“Well in case you change your mind, I’ll leave it here.” He’s playing that nice guy card, huh?  **Too bad fucker.** No one will be excused from my reign of terror. “I’m Professor Charle Ceres of Applied Magic, and you?”

“If I didn’t ask, do I still have to tell you?” I closed my book looking as irritated as possible. Was it my initial intention to treat him like trash? No, he did nothing wrong, besides being called  _ the best _ . But I’m certainly enjoying his reactions. “Assistant Professor Morris Dietrich of Life Magic.” 

“Life magic?—!” He was visibly taken aback. What? Did I not pass the life magic vibe check? “I see. May I ask where you got that book from?” Oh? He recognized my book. Could he be—no, I can’t jump to conclusions. The last time I trusted someone at first sight I ended up  **dead for 7 fucking years** only for us to never see each other again. Now that I’m older I can’t blame my idiocy on my teenage boy escapades.

“Am I not allowed to have this?” I replied, not even sparing him a glance.

“No—I just thought that maybe you were… somebody that I used to know. Ah, nevermind. I think I should leave.”

“Charle Ceres, I think not! You sit back down right this instant. It was your mistake for showing up if you did not truly want to welcome our new friend, but now that you’re here  **you will stay** . I made this food for us, and I’ll be damned,  **we are going to** **_eat_ ** **it** .” Balzac scolded him while effortlessly balancing four glass platters and three ceramic plates. He’s… incredible. Ceres sat down without another word. “I thought I said for you two to get along? Why have I turned my back for less than 5 minutes and you guys already hate each other?”

“It’s not like that at all! Just a small misunderstanding on my end.” Charle clarified, again with that annoying smile, but his eyes… looked so hurt? Gee, who put a foot up  _ your  _ ass? “And I shouldn’t have tried to spark a conversation while he was studying.” 

“Studying? Dietrich you have 24 hours in a day, yet you cannot spare one to spend with us?” 

“ _ Huh? _ Oh, I’m sorry.” 

_ Me. Me, I’m the person who put a foot up your ass. This bitch done threw me under the bus. I’ll remember this Ceres. _

“Forgiven,” Balzac gave a hearty laugh. “How about we start over with one another, yes?” We all smiled at the suggestion. Not as an indication of agreement, but because it was ridiculous. Ceres and I have known each other for less than five minutes and we’re already sworn enemies. There’s nothing that can be done about it now that I’ve made up my mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i bet you're wondering where the kush is lol just keep going guys you're 4 chapters deep why turn back now? 
> 
> winkwinkwink


	5. chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One bad idea after another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got some sleep :)

**(BALZAC’S POV LOVE ME SOME DANK OLD MAN)**

I’m currently sitting between a tornado and a volcano and I’m not mclovin’ it. On any other occasion the metaphor would be  _ epic  _ but I’ve already made one too many bad decisions today 

to deal with two angsty idiots. Can’t we all eat my perfectly prepared casserole in peace? 

They’re wasting my love :(

First of all, I  _ know _ there aren’t regulations to becoming a student, finding this blasted academy is proof of one’s skill enough. Yes I lied. It’s more fun this way. This Dietrich kid is special, and I’m not talking retarded. I can tell he’s a prodigy. Putting him with other students would be a waste of time. More interestingly, I can feel it in his soul energy. It’s always fluctuating between a line.  _ A line that separates what? _ I haven’t figured that part out yet. Clearly he’s hiding many secrets.

He could be dangerous, or he could be the next breakthrough in the field of Life Magic. It’s a risk I’m willing to take. And besides! All my grandchildren are ungrateful brats, it’s refreshing to meet a young’n considerate of my feelings and casserole. I wouldn’t mind fostering Dietrich into perfect magnificence. 

My thoughts were interrupted by Ceres clearing his throat. “Headmaster, you know that I’m a picky eater, I don’t like… casserole.” __

:’( I see how it is, Ceres, even after all the kindness I’ve shown you. “Fine, fine don’t eat it. I’m not offended. More for you, Dietrich.” 

The youngest snapped out of his trance when his name was mentioned. “Actually, I’m quite full from my serving already.” 

“I  _ insist  _ you eat more. You’re too thin! I feel like I could break your spine with a bear hug.” He let out an awkward laugh at my remark. “I’m not joking. You’re not leaving until you feed yourself.” 

“...yes sir.” Aw, so polite. He inhaled and force fed himself through his plate, breaking character a few times to curse under his breath.  **Listen here fucker I don’t see you cooking any better.** “I’m done, can I leave, now? Ceres doesn’t seem to be enjoying himself either.”

“No, no I’m—having a…  _ blast _ .” 

“If you’re going to lie to me, at least  _ try _ to be convincing.” 

Okay. 

He has yet to start his first day and he’s already making powerful enemies. Say, they’ll surely get along when I bust out the bottles. A couple rounds should get the fun started! Reminds me of my frat days... It shouldn’t be too big a deal; they’ll forget it all by morning, and hopefully, this silly blooming rivalry will fade away too. Of course I’ll be the sober one, gotta make sure they don’t end up killing each other, and more importantly, breaking my nifty ceramic plates. Ideally, I’m hoping some information will be leaked. Dietrich’s an interesting case altogether, but Ceres has unanswered questions and an unfinished past. The guy never acts strange around new people, so something about his behavior today tells me that Dietrich hit home.

“So you guys like horses?” I coughed up a question, only the most significant friend-making question of all time. 

Ceres didn’t look up from his plate again while Dietrich kept half glaring half glancing at him.

Plan B: “No horses? Ok, remind me not to spend our funds on them in the future. What about campfire songs?”

“Please don’t sing,” Ceres uttered, almost as if he were too afraid to raise his voice.

Bingo!  **BINGOOOO!**

Ceres is a beast at karaoke night, partly because the other professors may accidentally throw their hips out if they tried dirty dancing. He would never step down on an invitation to sing. This change of behavior undoubtedly has to do with the new guy.

“Alright boys, time to bring out the fine wine.” I got up and briskly walked back into the kitchen. I could hear Ceres questioning my intentions, but what is he actually gonna do about it?  **Jack shit you beta male.** I’m the fucking headmaster.

I rubbed my chin, thinking about the success rate of my ridiculous plan. A spell or two in the drinks to enhance the effects wouldn’t hurt… because I  _ know _ Ceres is a bitch-boy when it comes to drinking. Not too sure about Dietrich, but I’m fairly certain his alcohol limit is weak. He’s a goody two-shoes in an unconventional way. Like seriously, who says yes sir to me anymore. 

And my  _ God, _ I’m done playing monkey in the middle with these two throwing glances back and forth. The tension is so thick I could bake a cake. Not that anyone loves me enough to eat it... :(

Ceres is dense. He could get laid by anyone in this academy but he’s too good to them. Too pure. Too innocent.  _ It’s a facade, I just know it _ . Resorting to drugging him out of his mask is surprisingly not the worst thing I’ve done. 

Halfway through throwing whatever spell I felt like casting into the drinks, I remembered that I’m not trying to  _ poison _ them. And to be fair, I wasn’t really paying attention. No one should trust my cascade of random arcane magic to be safe, not even myself. I rummaged around in the cabinet and found a jar labelled  _ enhancers _ . 

Oh yes! I see my sweetest darling angel daughter uses these sometimes. If it can enhance magic, surely it’ll enhance the effect of some wine, too right? Fuck it, I’m the headmaster, it works like that because I said so. I remembered to say the magic word before throwing them into two new bottles of wine.

I returned. Nothing’s changed, but it could be worse. “Ceres, Dietrich, my boys, drink every last drop. It’s a direct order from me.” 

“What? Only a bottle?” Dietrich scoffed.

“ _ A whole bottle _ ?” Ceres lamented.

“Yes, sadly only one. Fine wine isn’t exactly cheap, but if it’s for the two of you, drink ‘till you’re dead!” It wasn’t fine wine. What am I made of money? It’s just cheap liquor I dyed red and spiked. I admit I was a little reckless with counting pills earlier, but if I remember correctly it was 3 for Dietrich and a whopping 5 for Ceres. Yes, he needs that many. I’d give him more but he’d notice the taste right off the bat. The liquor alone never gets me drunk enough to drown out my old man loneliness anway. I highly doubt they’d finish a bottle, much less be drunk by the end of it. “Show ‘em Dietrich. Show him that young ambition of yours.”

“I don’t have any interest in drinking, but if it’s a challenge,” he took a sip straight from the bottle before holding it up to toast. “Bottom’s up Ceres!”

_ Yes, yes the bottoms will be up. _

“Balzac, I didn’t come here to drink. I don’t want to be hungover when there are classes tomorrow.” When his toast was ignored, Dietrich rolled his eyes and gulped his bottle down until the tanginess got to him. He made an expression that his usual pretty-boy face should never make again. Ceres chuckled. “I think it’s his first time drinking, assuming he’s the legal drinking age. The whole bottle is too much, even for me—”

“Oh shut the _fuck_ up Ceres!” Dietrich grumbled. My thoughts exactly. 

**_Of course none of this is legal._ ** Drugging my own professors out of sheer curiosity and experimentation has never been and will never be legal. My moral compass is always spinning, so much that it crashed and burned a long time ago. I smiled, shushing off another protest from the academy’s biggest mama's boy. “Ceres, since you were the only one to show up, your incentive is to take a ‘ _ sick day _ ’ tomorrow, that is if you’re too hungover to teach classes. Dietrich, you too, as a welcoming gift.”

“That’s the most irresponsible thing I’ve ever heard.” 

“ _I’lllllll_ take i **t**.” Dietrich said. He stopped chugging, turned to me, admired my still young and beautiful thank you very much face and _giggled_. To see a grown ass man giggling like a freshman girl... never in a million years. “Thanks headmasssst—erghh. My head’s already spinning. This is unusually strong.” **_Shit_** **. He’s onto me.** “I don’t think I’ll finis- _hic_.” And yet he keepings drinking. 

Oh thank god, he’s already drunk. I may be accidentally fostering a future alcoholic.

Perfect! So it has begun.

“That’s enough, Dietrich. You don’t have to do this. You win, if that’s what you’re waiting to hear.” Ceres grabbed for Dietrich’s bottle in a futile attempt to get him to stop. 

My hand twitched, threatening to knock him out then and there. Ceres, I’m going to need you to stop being so responsible. But I resist the urge to interfere. I did my part, and now, I watch as the dominoes fall.

“ _ Don’t touch me.  _ Just drink like he said. Can’t you follow orders?” Dietrich one-shotted the rest of his bottle and nearly fell over. Hah, there’s a first time for everyone. “You’re getting outdone by me~? P— _ ah fuck _ — **pathetic** !” He stumbled onto Ceres and quickly pushed the other away, tripping back into his chair, smirking impishly. Damn Ceres your patience is immeasurable. Even I would have bitch slapped him.

Ceres pinched his nose, irritation rising. “Look, if I drink some of this, then we’re free to leave?”

“ _ All  _ of it, Ceres. And then you’re free to do whatever you want.” Or whoever, I glanced at Dietrich and snickered. I wouldn’t mind a turn of events.

“But then we’d both be drunk. I don’t want to ruin his or my own reputation if we’re caught doing something ridiculous on our way back to the dorms, which by the way,” he glanced at Dietrich who sent him the birdie finger instantaneously. “Is highly probable.” 

“Worry not, you can stay in my abode for tonight. I’ll be in my office doing paperwork all night after this anyway.”

“But isn’t that an invasion of your privacy, sir?” 

“Ceres, I could care less. The stack of papers on my desk won’t sign themselves so could you do us all a favor and get on with it? It won’t kill you to be a little scandalous just for tonight’s special occasion,” I glanced at Dietrich, and Ceres’s eyes followed. His eyes were half-lidded and his breathing rate slowed. I have to hurry, or else I won’t squeeze any information tonight at all! “He’s young, and sad to say, pretty lonely. You’re the only one who showed up. Could you just make him happy and let loose?  _ What happens here, stays here. _ ” 

Hurry up, give in to my peer pressure. 

“I don’t know what you’re implying, but I have an idea, and I do not like it. Not one bit.” Ceres said, toasting to Dietrich’s empty bottle. “ **What happens here, stays here.** ”

He had the same reaction as Dietrich. I don’t blame him; cheap liquor is disgusting. Too bad he doesn’t drink enough to tell the difference. “I’m,  _ guhh _ , I’m done. We’re dismissed?”

**_I knew 5 wasn’t enough_ ** . No, no, I just need to be patient and stall it out while making sure Dietrich over there is still conscious. “Yes, of course! If it bothers you so much to enter the master bedroom, there’s a guest room. But there’s only one bed. Could you escort Dietrich? He seems… dead.”

“Huh,  **_what_ ** ?” The sleeping beauty jolted awake and nearly face-planted but Ceres caught him by the collar. “ _ I'M nOt sLEePing wiTh hiM _ .”

Who said anything about sleeping with h— 

“Shut it princess. I can sleep on the floor if you’re going to keep whining so much. Although,” Ceres let go, and he fell over like a sad potato sack, not even bothering to catch himself. “It seems you’ve grown more accustomed to it.”

Oh my, drunk Ceres is a savage Ceres. I like that. I’ll take note of it. Drunk Dietrich is… babyish? A bean sprout of a man?

“J-just take me, will you?”  _ Wow he must be really out of it. _

“You have legs. Use them.” Ceres muttered, staggering his way to the corridor.

“Do me,” I’ve got it! Drunk Dietrich is horny! Intentionally? Possibly. “—a sss-olid. It’s my party, yeah? You could do this much for me!”

“I drank for you. That should be enough.” 

“ **You should’a drank anyway, pussy** !” 

Ceres turned around and glared at the sitting figure. “You’re so fucking— a child, Balzac, you’ve hired a  _ child _ .” So he  _ does _ curse. I’ll note that too. He half assedly helped him up, but the younger seemed to pass out upon contact. “I’ll drag you. I’ll fucking  _ drag  _ you.” 

“Hey now boys, we can talk this through like proper m—”

“I’ll cut your dick off.”

“Try me bitch.”

I was wrong.

When they were halfway through the corridor, still clumsy and fumbling every other step, I smiled to myself. So it wasn’t a  _ total  _ failure. They’re getting along at the bare minimum, but we’re taking baby steps. The hidden runes will capture everything behind closed doors so I’m free to sleep. The paperwork can wait. I haven’t done something so immoral in a while, but it’s nothing a little nap can’t fix.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> give balzac and his casserole love :(


	6. lol if you're only seeking the kush skip here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they did the do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please forgive me.

The hallway seemed endless. Ceres swears Balzac’s actively changing the interior of his house just to fuck with his clouded mind. Where exactly was he looking for again? All the doors look the same so it wouldn’t be his fault if he chose the wrong one. Apparently there were a lot of wrong ones because everytime he tried getting the automatic doors to open they’d deny access and he’d end up body slamming into them. 

_ This is a setup— _

“Ah!” His grip around Dietrich’s waist loosened while he was thinking, and the younger fell through the automatic doors of a random guest room, pink, glittery and adorned with unicorns and rainbows.

“Must be your calling.” Ceres snickered, about to turn heel and look for another room of his own until he heard a pissy voice jabbing at him.

“You do a shit job at escorting.” Dietrich said.

“Fuck you. I’m high.” was the response he got. “I can only do one thing at a time, princess, and hauling your fat ass around isn’t my problem now that Balzac’s gone.”

Dietrich sprawled out on the floor with no signs of recovery. “If you’re gonna call me a princess, at least treat me like one you  _ snake _ .” He pouted. He must be incredibly out of it for him to do such a thing.

“I’m not your servant.”

“You’re a fool, then?”

“It doesn’t make me foolish for refusing to put up with your bullshit.” 

“ _ Ughhh _ that’s not what I meant~. Why’re,  _ why-uhh _ ,  _ why _ are you so mEAN to me?” 

Ceres abandoned trying to break and enter into another room. Balzac’s definitely fucking with them making  _ this  _ eyebleeding abomination of a room the only accessible one. He beelined his way to the other and sat next to him. He loomed over him, propping himself with a single arm. 

Dietrich turned away. Ceres’s breath reeked of heavy alcohol. ‘ _ Don’t speak, oh god, don’t speak. _ ’

“I’m sorry, princess—” his surprisingly sober and sincere apology was interrupted with a slap across the face. “What the  _ fuck  _ Morris!”

“Your breath smells like shit.” 

“I  _ feel  _ like shit.” 

“ **You** **_look_ ** **like shit** — oh wait, my bad.” 

“You know what? Fuck you Morris. The one time I’m sincere.  _ FUck _ .  _ You _ .” 

Dietrich wanted to continue arguing but his head was throbbing. His vision blurred and cleared alternatively. He closed his eyes and again tried recollecting his senses. Never again will he pick up a bottle of ‘ _ fine wine _ ’. After the first sip, he’d known the drink was not only fake, but also spiked. So why the hell did he keep drinking? Must be pride. He’d been fighting for control to not make a fool of himself for trippin’ over just one bottle of fine wine in front of the headmaster and Ceres. And now comes the regret.

_ His head was  _ **_throbbing_ ** . 

_ Let go.  _

_ Have fun.  _

_ What would it cost you?  _

He gasped, jolting an inch off the ground. Had his headache been drowning out the heat of his body this whole time? How? It wasn’t like this earlier..? Not that he could remember earlier anymore. He could hardly think—not that he wanted to anyways— he wanted physical contact. 

All during that time, Ceres was mentally cursing the headmaster. He knew the ‘ _ wine _ ’ was spiked. He knew all of Balzac’s dirty tricks. Why did he drink it then? Because a drunken mind speaks an honest heart. Because Dietrich reminded him of that boy from 7 years ago, the one that haunts his dreams every now and then. He had been so sure it was him. He wanted to get to him, but not like  _ this. _ Now, he couldn’t make sense of the situation. What did he want again? 

_ Touch him, Ceres. See just how real he is. Your little nameless boy is right in front of you, all grown up, waiting for you to— _

He physically shook that thought away.  _ God, his head hurt. _ And his body? Burning—burning more than any spell he’s been hit with before. A voice inside his head screamed at him to let go, but he kept burying it back and back and b—

“Fuck me.”

Ceres turned his head back to face Dietrich, nearly falling onto the other. His vision was hazy, and his depth perception was failing him. “Yeah, fuck you.” He turned away again and started to undo some drapes. Maybe he could just sleep it out, and everything will be fi—

“A command, Ceres.  _ Fuck.  _ Me.” Dietrich sat up, leaning on his elbow and yanked on the little green pin that held all of Ceres’s drapes together. He stared at him with eyes full of nothing but lust. “If you won’t be my servant, if you won’t be my fool, be my prince and fuck me senseless.” Goddamn he was thirsty. He  _ needed  _ physical contact. He fumbled around with Ceres’s black undershirt, getting frustrated that he wasn’t making any progress. “T-take it off already! Why the hell do you wear so many layers when it’s so—  _ hot _ .” 

Ceres took the other’s shaking hands off of him and pulled the shirt over himself. “This is not what ‘ _ fuck you _ ’ means, by the way.” He cracked a joke, participating in what he thought to be foreplay. Why not? This was all a drunk joke anyways. “Call me your king, and I’ll  _ conquer  _ you.”

“Really? I thought it’s because you wanted me to call you daddy.” Ceres didn’t respond to that idea. In a single motion he pulled the other’s flimsy shirt over his head. Dietrich got the gist of what he was trying to do and raised his arms to let him finish. To his surprise, Ceres bounded his arms together using the shirt as soon as he got it off. “ _ Why? _ ” 

“If you know anything about imperialism, the conqueror does as he pleases by force and without opposition.”

Dietrich scoffed and cut the shirt using his magical strings. “You’re into bondage, huh? Tonight’s  _ my  _ night. I’ll have it the way  _ I _ want it.” 

“What  _ do _ you want then?” Ceres got up to his feet, turned off by the use of magic in such a mood. 

“Do I have to repeat myself?” He sent another string to cut Ceres’s pants off. His smartass demeanor was changing by the second. It would only be another minute before his sentences would be reduced to incoherent whimpers. 

Ceres mourned the loss of his pants with all the control he had left in him. For him, it wasn’t too late to turn away and leave Dietrich to touch himself on the floor. But then he wouldn’t be able to have a peaceful night's sleep. “Using magic in  _ this _ setting? I’m not aroused. If you want to whore it out tonight, you’d better think of something quick.” 

Dietrich staggered to his feet and pushed Ceres into the bed. He didn’t trust his voice to speak anymore. The drugs were in full effect. He was on top of Ceres with his legs propped on either side so that their bodies weren’t touching. Ceres looked at the wreck above him, unbothered. He waited for him to make a move. 

Dietrich’s pants were the ones made from soul energy so they dispersed on command along with his undergarments. 

‘ _ A magical pair of pants? That’s interesting…’ _

Cut that thought, Dietrich’s unrestrained glory pressed up against Ceres’s stomach. Ceres squirmed. He was  _ not _ looking to be on the bottom tonight, or like… ever, actually. How far is this joke going to go exactly..?

‘ _ You’re going to fuck me? I didn’t think this is what you meant by having it your way. Oh lord, oh lord, oh lord. At least prepare my ass first.’  _ Ceres snapped out of his daze and saw that Dietrich had started sucking on his own fingers. ‘ **_NO WAIT I DIDN’T MEAN IT!—_ ** _ ’ _

Much to his surprise, Dietrich didn’t touch him. In fact, he started fingering himself. Ceres was too dumbstruck to react until Dietrich’s free arm gave into the pleasure and he collapsed onto him. He could see from his peripheral just how hard the younger was gripping the sheets next to his head, and he could feel just how hard the younger  _ was _ now that they’re body to body.

**_Why’s he touching yourself from the back? His ass isn’t what’s needing attention. I didn’t expect him to swing that way…_ **

_ Should I push him off or— no, no it’s his night. I can just stall it out. _

**_Are you dumb? Do_ ** **you** **_swing that way? No? Then get him off!_ **

_ The only thing I find sexy is arcane magic.  _

_... _ **_You lonely bastard._ **

_ Besides, it couldn’t hurt to watch…  _

**_Unbelievable_ ** _. _

Ceres’s mental dialogue should be continuing to scold some sense into him, but it stopped. He didn’t dare to move, not fully grasping the fact that Dietrich was masturbating over his body. Sometimes the younger would grind against him whenever he would scissor himself in the right places, and other times he would spout a string of curses in between his panting and follow it up with Ceres’s name. 

_ He said what? _

**_He’s quite obviously calling for you._ **

_ None of this was a joke?  _

**_… are you fucking stupid or what? What part about him fingerfucking himself to you do you not understand?_ **

_ Hey! You were just telling me to get him off and now you’re having a change of heart? Bullshit conscience.  _

“Dietrich, stop.”

“You don’t have to do anything. Just stay still and shut the hell up.”

_ Not gonna lie this is kinda hot. _

**_...You two are both horny as hell…_ **

_ Blame it on Balzac. _ ****

**_Good grief, if you’re sober enough to talk to yourself, you’re sober enough to make your own decisions. Why are you making this hard for yourself? go. get. him. before he gets you. You’re not a bottom are you?_ **

_ What do I do?  _

**_THE FUCK YOU MEAN ‘WHAT DO I DO?’ TAKE HIS ASS AND SHOVE YOURSELF IN IT._ **

_ That’s kinda gay. _

**_You’re astronomically gay._ **

Ceres still couldn’t believe his ears until after the third time he heard the younger moan his name. One arm snaked around the smaller figure and made the both of them sit up while the other lent in two dry fingers. Dietrich gasped at the sudden infiltration while Ceres found a spot on his neck to mark with a plan to alleviate the pain. Fight fire with fire, right? 

“Dumb– _ ahh _ ss— _ shit _ . If you’re not gonna get your fingers wet first at least be a little more gent– _ aH _ —!” 

“‘Mouth’s occupied.” Ceres mumbled through his teeth, which found interest in tearing at Dietrich’s erect nipples. Forget marking his neck, marking his nipple is more erotic. 

Dietrich put up with it until Ceres bit particularly hard, using a combination of tongue and teeth to lap away the saliva. “ _ Princess _ is just a pet name! I’m not a girl. I have a  _ dick _ . Abusing my nipples won’t get you milk.”

“That’s to say abusing your dick will?” Ceres used his unoccupied hand to squeeze the precum out of Dietrich, who seemed to have fainted upon being touched there. “Passing out already? Can’t even finish what you’ve started?” 

Dietrich intertwined their fingers from inside him and pulled them out all together. “It hasn’t begun yet. Not until you get hard.” 

“You’re going to use that mouth of yours for something other than talking? Hah.” Dietrich managed to give him an intimidating glare despite the urge to abandon his dignity and suck him dry. He opted to stand his ground and jerk him off instead, pressing his thumb against Ceres’s tip to deny the flow of precum. He looked Ceres in the eyes the entire time while holding a surprisingly nonchalant expression. He dug his nail into the slit and blew a gust of cold air.

“ _ Don’t tease me. _ ” Ceres growled in an astoundingly low register that Dietrich could lose himself just listening to. He impulsively grabbed for the younger’s neck, only letting go to grasp the sheets when Dietrich joysticked his erection. Dietrich used the split second break to get back on top of him.

He straddled Ceres, aligning his entrance to Ceres’s tip. “ _ Eyes on me, Charle _ .” He slammed himself down and let out more of a scream than a moan. He knew doing it dry would hurt but he didn’t expect it would hurt  _ this  _ much. Nonetheless, he would persevere. Ceres groaned, not expecting that Dietrich would be stubborn enough to go down on him dry. But  _ damn _ it felt good. The friction felt fucking  _ amazing _ , for him of course. For Dietrich, it was more like getting stabbed up his ass repeatedly, and it had yet to feel pleasurable. 

Despite the lack of balance, Dietrich refused to hold onto Ceres’s body. Ceres didn’t touch him at first either, but eventually the temptation of the younger’s porcelain body got to him. He thumbed circles on Dietrich’s nipples and went in for a taste of his defined collar bones. Only then did Dietrich allow a hand to grab Ceres’s neck and the other one to cling onto his white hair. He was even daring enough to angle Ceres’s head and make direct eye contact. Ceres’s eyes had previously been relishing his body and took as long as possible to meet his. The anticipation he created proved Dietrich’s decision to be a grave mistake. 

_ He’s taking that “eyes on me” line way too far.  _

**_Shouldn’t have said it then, smartass._ **

_ This isn’t the support I’m looking for right now.  _

**_Didn’t think he could fuck you with his eyes too, huh?_ **

He began to whimper, but Ceres’s look of ecstasy motivated him to continue. The pace slowed down as it took more strength from him to keep going without Ceres’s assistance. It got to a point where he would rise and let gravity finish the deed for him. It was a rude awakening when Ceres grabbed his hips and shoved the rest of his length back into him. Ceres switched their positions without resistance, pushing the younger into the mattress. He remained deep inside him, unmoving. “Watching you struggle isn’t enough for me,  _ Morris _ .” 

Dietrich didn’t have the energy to protest. He broke eye contact, trying to regain some of his lost pride. There was nothing prideful about wanting Ceres to take control. He didn’t need to be looking at him; he could  _ feel _ Cere’s eyes on him. Those familiar amber eyes that he (deniably) held dear to his heart could devour him right now. 

_ “ _ Hurry up then, bastard.” Dietrich closed his eyes in surrender. He heard his own voice inside his head screaming at him to get his shit together.

_ You’re late. Couldn’t you have given me some sense before I stuck his dick in me?  _

**_It shouldn’t matter when I show up. You should know this is wrong._ **

_ It feels right so it is right.  _

**_It’s not him._ **

_ Does it matter if it’s not him? What? Did you want it to be him?  _

**_YOU want it to be him. That's why you’re giving into this._ **

_ Same eyes. Same hair. Same peabrain. This might as well be him. So what if I want him? The nameless guy or ceres. I could care less. This is not an emotional need. This is a physical need. He gets me off better than my fingers so I took him. That’s it.  _

**_you should’ve just fisted yourself then._ **

His thoughts were rudely interrupted when Ceres began slowly stroking his length. “You’re too fucking hot. I hate it.” Ceres mumbled, mouth having gone back to tonguing his chest. Dietrich concentrated on summoning reason in himself again. He’s sober enough for that? Maybe. He’s trying his hardest to think, but when Ceres was pleasuring him in all the right ways, his hardest isn’t enough. 

_ He does it better.  _

**_You’re saying his dick is bigger than your hand?_ **

_ I'm saying he fucks me better than I can.  _

**_Is that how you feel?_ **

_ it’s just sex. There are no feelings beyond pain and pleasure.  _

**_Very well. If this is what you want, drown yourself in it, vile whore._ **

“ _His_ vile whore _.”_ Dietrich moaned under his breath. ‘ _shit. I said that out loud?’_

“Another command?” Ceres’s nails dug into Dietrich’s small hips to hold him in place as he grinded into him. “What is it this time princess? Say it again louder.” Dietrich opened his mouth to answer, realizing he was being forced to, but every thought he formed was left unspoken, being interrupted by either a moan or a curse. 

“Ch– _ ahh _ —!  **_Stop_ ** it!” 

“Whatever you say.”

“ _ No! No _ ! That’s not what I meant. I–khhh  _ fuck.  _ That _ hurts—” _

“Then tell me  _ exactly _ what you mean.” Extra emphasis on the word  _ exactly _ because Ceres had a feeling he found Dietrich’s sweet spot. Now grinding against  _ that _ generates a  _ completely  _ different response. He smirked at the way Dietrich would arch his back and roll his hips to get impossibly closer. “I’m waiting.” 

“Ceres. Charle—  _ nghh _ , I swear to fUcKing g– _ ahh _ . If you don’t fuck me into this goddamn bed right nOW, I will cut your fucking dick off–f _ uck ughh–  _ and see euphoria my _ self _ .” 

“Hmm? I beg your pardon.” 

“You little—  _ shit _ . You  _ heard _ me! Take me through these fucking sheets. Pummel my ass ‘till I bleed. Break my fUcKinG spine. I don’t  _ care _ . I just need you to  _ move _ !” 

“Say the magic word.” 

“ **_DADDY._ ** ” 

Well  _ that _ isn’t the magic word, but he’ll take it any day. He moved, each thrust filled with hatred and admittingly, pent up longing. The whole thing had already been rough as it was, but for some reason, Ceres felt like making Dietrich  _ hurt _ . Unrelenting. Forget comfortable pacing, Ceres was unrelenting. 

How could Dietrich taint the image of someone so precious to him? Unless this is who the boy from the past has grown up to be. 

_ Impossible _ .  _ He’s dead. _

_ Why didn’t you take my hand? _

_ Why did you do something so foolish? _

_ Why did you come back? Haunting my dreams wasn’t enough for you? _

_ Leave. Me. Alone.  _

Dietrich didn’t like this at all. Maybe doing it dry was a bad idea… hey, if it’ll get him off this heat he’ll put up with it. Besides that, Ceres didn’t look like he was enjoying himself either. It was challenging to sneak a look at the man above him when he was actively being hammered into the bed. Amber eyes were clouded, he was out of it again. 

_ What happened? You weren’t like this earlier. _

Dietrich didn’t dwell on the thought for long, with his climax rapidly approaching and Ceres still recklessly droning into him. 

_ A-are you not pulling out?! _

Dietrich’s hands snaked up Ceres’s back, clawing at them in a signal to pull out. He didn’t trust his mouth to speak words, given that he was moaning his vocal chords out. Ceres didn’t respond, seemingly looking through him rather than at him. They ended up coming together, much to Dietrich’s dismay, Ceres did not pull out.

“You’re disgusting.” Dietrich pushed him off.

“I don’t want to hear it from you.” Ceres responded rather coldly, coming back from his ghostly reverie. “Are you satisfied, princess?”

“Clean me up,” Dietrich muttered, spreading his legs a little wider to give the other a full view of what he had just done. “That hurt, a lot, I’ll have you know.”

Ceres wordlessly did what he was told, significantly more gentle than he was the first time. The sight of dried blood disturbed him, much more than having to tongue Dietrich’s ass clean of his load. 

“Don’t tell me you’re hard again.”

“Whose fault is that?” Dietrich said, aroused to say the least, “I didn’t expect you to comply…” 

Ceres sighed, realigning their bodies for a round two. He took it slowly this time, gently nibbling on the other’s skin instead of branding him with teeth marks and even letting the other establish the momentum. Dietrich was confused as to the sudden change in demeanor. What was this some kind of apology sex for making his ass a bloody waterfall earlier? 

Dietrich doesn’t remember when he blacked out, and Ceres didn’t care enough to notice, continuing the slow sex until he was satisfied. 

Not once did they kiss. 

From his office, Balzac watched the playback with his mouth agape. 

“ _ What. The. Fuck. Did. I. Just. Do.”  _ It was supposed to be a joke,  _ and it was _ …  **_until they started fucking like rabbits_ ** . 

He ran back into the kitchen and checked the drugs he had used. It was aphrodisiac mixed with regular pills. He needs to have a talk with his sweet darling angel daughter immediately. He had seen her take these pills many times to  _ enhance her performance in battle  _ so he had thought it was just a plain enhancer which would boost the effects of alcohol. 

_ But boy was he wrong _ . 

Maybe it was his fault for not checking. Maybe it was his fault for drugging his professors in the first place. To say they bonded would be an understatement. 

Balzac grimaced to himself and schemed on how he was going to wake them up when morning comes. ‘ _ Or maybe I shouldn’t. I didn’t stop them then, I probably shouldn’t stop them ever.’ _

It was three in the morning when Dietrich regained consciousness. The room had no windows, and the motion-sensor lights were off. He couldn’t see anything but he felt a sharp pain in his ass. He wasn’t completely off his high nor fully awake but he had enough sense in him to pull it out. He made up for the missing warmth in his nether region by cuddling closer to… 

He fell back into peaceful slumber.

Ceres woke up about half an hour later. He sat up, clutching his head, and summoned a small ball of light to see where he was. This was much softer than the floor. And why was he so cold? Did he always sleep naked?

‘ _ Wait, I’m naked?’ _ In sudden terror, he looked over at the bed. That was no pillow he was sleeping with. That was the new guy next to him… also buttnaked. ‘ _ I’m so fucked… _ ’ He glanced at the nightstand in search of his discarded clothes but found himself a cup of water and a note. 

It read:  _ What happens here, stays here. _

Ceres stumbled his way into the private bathroom and poured the water out. He will never eat nor drink  _ anything _ Balzac handed to him again. What should he do from here? Should he tell Dietrich? No, of course not. He still wanted to have a serious conversation with him about how he could possibly be the nameless boy from the past. Starting the conversation with ‘ _ I fucked you to Cloud 9 while we were drunk _ .’ was not up for consideration.

He  _ was _ the one doing the fucking right?  **_Right_ ** _? _ His lower body didn’t seem to be in pain but he felt drained of all his energy. He made a decision to shower, get dressed, and leave before this mess gets any worse. It was a selfish move, but it was for the best. Dietrich can connect the dots on his own.

The cold shower helped him sober up, but then unwanted memories of last night came flooding back. He wanted to condemn himself for getting hard over it, but it’s better to finish the deed here and be free from it by dawn. He’s already reached the rock bottom of morality so might as well just get it over with. 

A knock on the door interrupted his endeavors. “Ceres, hurry the hell up.”  _ Shit _ , now was not the time for confrontation. With his glory still in hand, he said the door wasn’t locked, which by the way,  _ how could he be so distracted to not lock a damn door? _

The last person he wanted to see stood before him, also fully naked. And now that he was standing in the light, the consequences of last night could be seen on his body, from bruises to bitemarks and dried blood to— that bodily fluid that both of them refuse to acknowledge. He used the wall as a desperate crutch because  _ someone  _ decided to leave their dick up his ass for hours on end. “If you’re wondering whether last night happened or not, the answer is yes. I don’t know how many fucking pills that old man slipped in my drink, but I’m still…” His breath fell short as his heat returned. 

“You’re asking for round three?” Ceres looked at him in disbelief, trying his hardest not to finish jerking off in front of the other.

“Round three started when you decided you weren’t pulling out.” Dietrich snapped at him for half a second before returning to that desperate expression he wore all of last night. “Ceres, don’t make me beg again…” 

“I’m— I’m sober, Dietrich. This isn’t right. I’d be taking advantage of you.” 

“Do you think  _ I’m  _ not sober? I’m starting to think Balzac gave us water dyed red and badly diffused drugs. I was basically sober the whole fucking night dumbass! I  _ chose _ to do it with you.”

“Still, you’re under the influence of aphrodisiacs. You’re not in your right mind.” 

“Under the influence of aphrodisiacs, I could’ve rode my  _ fist _ until sunrise. But no, I chose to ride you.” He let out a shaky laugh. “U _ ghh _ –  _ it’s getting close _ – don’t act like you don’t want to continue where you left off. I heard you jerking to me, but now that I’m  _ right _ here waiting for you to touch me, you’re backing out? ‘The fuck’s that?” His tried to sound pissed off, but it came out more of a whine than anything else. 

“I’m sorry. I really can’t.” Ceres avoided eye contact. One look and it wouldn’t matter if he were to discard his honor for round three. 

“Then  _ move _ so  _ I _ can.” Ceres condensed himself to fit on one side of the bathtub, which was larger than usual ones, but they were two grown ass men. This was uncomfortable to say the least. Dietrich glanced at Ceres’s unveiled glory. “ _ Eyes on me _ ,  _ Charle. _ ” Ceres got harder in memory of that same line from last night. Great, there goes his progress. “Maybe it’ll help with your situation there, and you could get to work on time.” Since the effects of alcohol ran out, Dietrich returned to his smartass self, but the aphrodisiacs just won’t go away. He was still incredibly horny.

Ceres closed his eyes and looked up, hoping the cold water would calm him down. Meditation would get rid of his hard-on right? No. Not when the reason why he’s hard in the first place is still horny as hell. Dietrich was really confident in his body being on display. He was also serious about riding his fist until sunrise.

**_What the fuck? Did he just shove the whole thing in there all at once?_ ** __

_ Well, yeah, I wasn’t exactly gentle with him earlier. He must still be stretched. _

Ceres doesn't know why he’s contemplating this. Dietrich is sober, horny, but sober. 

**_Then why is he still masturbating to you?_ **

_ Maybe he’s serious…  _ **_holyshitwhatareyoudoing?_ **

Dietrich used a magical string to bind his free hand to one of the hanging shower heads and another one to restrict his erection. He was denying his own climax. What? It’s more erotic that way. He was mumbling some gibberish that Ceres would prefer not to decipher but his natural intelligence didn’t spare him. 

“Charle— _ ahnghh _ ! What are you doing dumbass? L-let me go!” 

_ Oh, not this shit again… _

**_Drown it out Ceres._ **

“ _ You’re going too h–ahh–rd. Let me t–ahh–ouch myself… _ ” 

_ Is he really fantasizing about me? _

**_He’s just trying to provoke you._ **

“ _ Please, I’m so... close….”  _

_ … _

**_Ceres? you’re not doing it again. CERES ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND—_ **

Dietrich’s eyes fluttered open, and the strings disappeared when he felt Ceres pulling his fist out to replace it with his long anticipated shaft. “It took you longer than I’d expected.” His clean hand reached for Ceres’s face to caress it once before entangling itself into his hair. “Was I not good enough?” he asked sincerely through a cracked whisper. 

“I was  _ right there _ , and you pulled something like this?” 

“I was merely doing what you did.” 

“If it’s anyone that takes you to euphoria, it will be me.” 

“Of course, my own fist could never fill me up like you do.” He chuckled. “But if you release inside me a second time, you’ll lose an inch or two.”

It’s not that Ceres intended on driving the other into the wall, it’s that the other couldn’t stand on his own two legs anymore and the wall happened to be conveniently placed. Ceres took Dietrich from behind unrelentingly until the end of it. His hands shifted from holding his hips to rubbing his inner thighs. Dietrich’s body responded well to the change of action, and it took much concentration from Ceres not to lose himself right then at how tight Dietrich got around him. Euphoria was getting increasingly closer. The pace had to quicken if they ever wanted to see it together.  _ Closer and closer until the world goes blank. _

Dietrich leaned back into Ceres’s embrace softly smiling at him. Through those half-lidded eyes of exhaustion was a look less of lust and more of… more of uhh—  _ more of what…? _ Ceres didn’t want to think about it. Not when Dietrich felt so fragile in his arms. 

_ Good _ . It took absolutely no effort to turn him over and make him face him. Dietrich’s expression changed into genuine surprise. Ceres pressed their foreheads together.

_ His eyes. They have to be the same ones.  _ Piercingly crimson, even after succumbing to pleasure multiple times, Dietrich’s eyes stayed piercingly crimson. Ceres became distracted by the one part of his body he had yet to claim.  _ His lips. _ Why can he so easily shove his dick into the younger, but to kiss him is impossible? Because he is sober now. There is no excuse for his behavior anymore. 

**_There’s no passion in lust, Ceres. Don’t make a mistake._ **

Dietrich may’ve been thinking the same. They haven’t kissed once over the course of three rounds, and now that their lips were millimeters apart, he still couldn’t bring himself to kiss the older. Dietrich turned away and slumped against the wall. He closed his eyes and thanked the cold water for washing away tonight’s impurities. 

“Dietrich,”  _ Hm? _ “Look at me for once.” He opened his eyes. Amber eyes looked strikingly golden now, like they had been during their first run. He shook the creeping lust away. His body was in no condition for another go.  _ But those damned eyes of his brought great temptation with every passing second. _

“Ack—! You  _ fucker _ .” Dietrich cursed, nearly jumping out of his skin when he felt the exact thing he was trying to avoid recurring. “How many times do I have to scream for you to realize that  _ this hurts. _ ”

“Continually,” Ceres murmured. “I won’t go deeper than this. I just wanted to  _ see _ your eyes during this. Close your ass around me, not your eyelids.” 

“Is this some kind of sick kink- _ khh _ .” Dietrich was drained. He was pissed off that Ceres didn’t give him a heads up before deciding round four was a thing, but he didn’t hate this. “Give me  _ you  _ not your fingers.” 

Ceres relished the split second switch from mockery to desperation, all conveyed through those captivating eyes. “If you close your eyes at any point during this, I’ll stop.” His message was understood clearly. Ceres’s pace matched that of the apology sex early, but this time, Dietrich noticed, the other was actually  _ here _ in the moment with him. That thought alone low-key turned him on. Ceres didn’t make it too hard for Dietrich, who often broke eye contact but more or less kept his eyes open. 

He didn’t have to tell the older to clean him up and carry him back to bed, Ceres took responsibility for it. The sheets were stained so Ceres wrapped one of his drapes around the younger before flopping him on the bed and throwing a blanket over him. 

“You’re not staying?” Dietrich said, on the verge of passing out again. He tangled their fingers together in an attempt to keep Ceres, but there was no grip to it. “Don’t leave me.” 

“Your night is over. We’ve had enough fun. If I stay until morning, we might do it a fifth time. I need to show up to class for my students. And you… need to be able to walk by yourself, even if you take a day off.” Something about the way their hands fit perfectly triggered a memory of the nameless boy when he used to link their hands together and—

“Okay.”  _ No opposition? That’s surprising. _ “Say my name.” 

_ A strange request, an easy one though. _ “Morris Dietrich?”

“Your whore.” 

“ _ My _ **_what?_ ** ”

“Oh, right. Your  _ vile _ whore.”

**_I knew he wasn’t fucking sober…_ **

Ceres facepalmed. “I’m not going t—  _ ugh _ . Alright, sleep tight, my v—uhhh.” 

**_Just say it. It’s the one chance you get to insult him without getting your ass beat. Just say it so you can leave already._ **

_ He’s not… like that though…  _

**_Yeah, he kinda is. What? Do you pity him? This is how one night stands work._ **

_ We did it four times. Four. Fucking. Times. _

**_So? It’s just sex no matter how many times you do it. There’s no love._ **

_ I didn’t say love.  _

**_Then what did you want from him? What was there to gain from fucking him four times?_ **

_ …  _

“Vile whore.” Ceres managed to halfway mumble. Dietrich giggled and closed his eyes. In a matter of seconds he was asleep. Ceres wasn’t sure if he would remember this night when he wakes up. He wasn’t sure if he wanted him to. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> awkward porn writer award goes to... :)


	7. chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It can't be...
> 
> and hangover moments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys 'v' sorry it took so long to edit through that shitshow of a chapter. it's cursed isn't it.

“Sneaking out this early in the morning?” Balzac yawned. “You set off my security, you know. Would hate it if it woke him up too, hm?” 

Ceres stopped in his tracks and whipped around in clear agitation. “i’m not happy with what you did.” 

“Oh? you sounded ecstatic earlier.” 

“You  _ know _ what you did.”

“And you know what  _ you  _ chose to do. It’s obvious you had some sense of self control. If you want to argue, I have the evidence.”

“You mean you—!”

“ _ Saw everything _ . Ceres, remember what I said.” 

Ceres sighed and quoted: “What happens here, stays here.” Balzac nodded and grinned heartily at his favorite professor. 

“I'll break it to him slowly.” Balzac offered, a bluff obviously.

“What? No!” Cere blushed profusely. “If he forgets then that’s less trouble for all of us. I don’t want him to remember.” 

“He won’t, that is to say his memory won’t be as explicit as yours. Nonetheless, how could he not piece it together himself? You were absolutely  _ reckless  _ with his body.”

“Ugh! And whose fault is that?” 

“Shared responsibility, Ceres. You weren’t even that drunk. The bottles got switched.” 

“...so you  _ did  _ spike them! How could you?–!”

“It was an honest mistake. I thought they were simple enhancers when I put them in, but my daughter is… going through a phase. she mixed aphrodisiacs in there. You were given 2 enhancers and 1—.” 

“And Dietrich? How many  _ enhancers _ were in his?” 

“Ahahaha,” I laughed awkwardly. He was not swayed by my old man charm. “None. He got five aphrodisiacs.”

“ _ Fi— _ how the hell do you mess up that badly?” 

“I'm old as hell Ceres! In my mind, I was giving you 5 enhancers because I just knew you weren’t going to drink the whole thing but I wanted the effects to be just as strong.” 

“Oh my g— why did you drug us in the first place?”

“ _ Because _ you two are off to a bad start. You both are seeking answers from each other but are too damn childish to reconcile. Remember when you used to show me all your exploration logs? I know about the little boy that scarred you, and I'm fully sure Dietrich is the one you’re looking for.” 

“No.” Ceres said immediately, not even stopping to consider my theory. “He died.” 

“Just because he died doesn’t mean that he’s dead.” 

“That’s the same damn thing!” He nearly screamed. “You know what, can we not talk about this right now?”

“I know you think this too. You could’ve left if you wished. You know I like you too much to do anything about it, and yet you stayed.” 

“I don’t want to talk about this with you.” 

“Then who, ceres? Who are you going to talk to about this? Him?  _ Great idea _ . Instead of running away from your past, how about you go and face it when it’s literally sleeping right next to you. It will not get any easier for you than tonight. You messed up when you were sober, and I was hoping that getting you two drunk would bring in a flood of truth that I could recount to you in the morning, but things didn’t go as planned.” 

“And what if he’s not the one i’m looking for? The one I'm looking for is no longer on the face of Vendacti.  _ I’m not looking for anyone, _ Balzac.”

“You may not be looking for him but he’s looking for you. Dietrich came into this academy without any documentation. He is incredibly talented in life magic. Why would he want to be a student when he’s already so capable? It was his promise to you 7 years ago, Ceres. How has this not lined up for you already? Aside from his looks, there are other things. Dietrich was probably left by his parents to die and resurrected once. And he’s resurrected again from his second death in search of you. I can feel it in his soul energy—.” 

“Resurrection is not possible. You know this.” 

“You didn’t believe him back then, and when the universe gives you a second chance, you still don’t believe him?” 

“I can’t know for certain if what you’re saying is true and I'm not taking that risk.” 

“It’ll be a thorn in your side until you at least confirm it with him. Even if you’re wrong, you’ll at least know for certain that he is gone.” 

“I've always known that he is gone.” 

“Don’t lie to yourself.” 

“So getting my hopes up is not lying to myself?” 

“If you didn’t have the pressing thought that Dietrich could be the boy, then why did you stay? Why did you oblige to  _ fuck him into the sheets _ when you clearly had enough sense in you to turn your back? He didn’t force you to do a damn thing. You  _ do _ believe. Even if it’s in the back of your mind, it’s still there.”

And when Ceres didn’t respond, Balzac snapped all the lights off again and temporarily deactivated his security. He dismissed him. “see you at work, ceres. Oh—! And put on some goddamn pants.” Balzac was frustrated that Ceres didn’t believe him but he wanted him to come to realize it himself. Although he could debate with him for hours, he respects Ceres enough to let him decide. 

That being said, Balzac is one hell of a meddler. 

\\\\\

There was a knock on the door and in came Balzac along with all the triggered motion-sensor lights. “Rise and shine professor!” 

Dietrich pretended not to hear him. He had been awake for 15 minutes now but he didn’t want to get up. Were these the effects of a hangover? It was the first time He’s gotten drunk and he couldn’t remember a damn thing. Had it been glorious or another moment in his life he’ll have to live down? 

“No, seriously. It’s almost noon, and I need to get to work. did you sleep well?”

“I actually did and I wish it could be like that forever.”

“Hungover?” 

Dietrich struggled to sit up. “My head’s not what’s hurting.” when he managed to do so, the drapes around his shoulders sagged a little, revealing an inch of marked skin. “Huh? what is this?” Green pin, white drape.  _ Ceres _ . “What happened last night?” 

“Hah, you almost sound like you’re too afraid to ask!”

“Just tell me what I–  _ we  _ did. Did we fight?” 

“ _ Fight _ ? oh goodness no. I wouldn't consider it a fight. just a little roughhousing. If anything, you two sounded like you guys were having loads of fun.” 

“Stop fucking with me old man! What happened after we got drunk?” 

Balzac smirked. He placed Dietrich’s new uniform on the main nightstand and picked up his discarded book and belt off the floor. “If you’re dying to know, ask Ceres but I’m sure you can figure this one out on your own.” 

“Ceres was sober?  _ That fu—. _ ” 

“Sober? Not in the slightest. He just woke up before you. That’s all.” Balzac turned to leave. “Change my sheets before you go back to sleep. You have all of today to do whatever you want. uniform’s over there and the whole campus is yours to explore. That’s  _ if _ you can get out of bed.” 

“Cheeky bastard.” Dietrich muttered. He eased his way out of bed and nearly fell when his feet touched the floor. His legs felt detached from his body. “ _ What type of arcane magic shit is this? _ ”

He stepped in front of the bathroom’s grand mirror and inhaled a few times before taking the pin out. His calmness fell with Ceres’s drape. How was he feeling exactly? Shocked? Horrified? Disgusted? Angry? All. As much as he would want to deny it, he knew exactly what happened yesterday. He marveled at the amount of hickeys around his neck, chest, and—

“ _Holy_ _shit_ what did you do _here_?–!” His left nipple was torn up beyond belief and looked as if it were barely hanging on his chest. His fingertips accidentally grazed it when he was checking if any of this was a reality and he nearly screamed, instantaneously wincing in shame. “Okay that was _not a_ moan. It just hurts more than it looks.” 

He glanced at the bathtub and saw traces of his soul energy on the shower head. He pushed back the possibility that they fucked in the tub and stepped in to indignantly wash his body. “Once on the bed wasn’t enough? Just how many pills did that old bastard slip in our drinks…” Assuming the drinks were spiked. How could they not be? One bottle would have never gotten these results. “You’re such a fool for trusting him, such a damn fool Dietrich.” 

The water running down his skin stung like hell, but it made him feel clean. He furiously scrubbed himself down and down until he reached his bottom half. He was suddenly flustered. all his pride had already been long gone but just the thought of letting  _ Ceres _ of all people inside him was unbearable, even  _ if  _ they were both drunk off their asses. There was no doubt he was on the receiving end. Efforts to convince himself otherwise would be in vain. Dietrich once again tried to regain his composure and decided to just get it over with. 

Wait a minute. there were traces of soul energy on his dick. “ _ Why the fuck would there be traces of soul energy on my dick? _ ” he frowned and hesitantly carried on. Next was his ass, the toughest part to clean. That's assuming he didn’t put Ceres's dick in his mouth too. He had strong faith in himself that even when he was out of his damn mind, he would  _ never _ give Ceres that luxury. 

_ How would I even do this? I'm not gonna finger myself just to clean my… interior. _

**_Oh, but you will. better to leave everything behind here than to walk out with traces of his dick up your ass._ **

“Goddamn it.” There was no pride left for him to bite down anyways. He felt disgraced yet determined to cleanse himself. Is this the life he waited 7 years to come back to?  _ Is it _ ? When he’s sober, probing his ass was  _ out of the question.  _ He didn’t know where to start or what angle he would have to insert his fingers so it wouldn’t hurt as much. “I'm probably stretched as hell. Just get it over with. Just do it and don’t think anything of it.”

Today was just not his day. his body and mind were not agreeing at all. He clumsily poked his hole and his knees buckled as if on command. He leaned against the wall for support and impatiently inserted two fingers inside. The slow and easy tactic was not working so plan B was to go all in. There was some kind of fluid already inside of him. 

‘ _ No… he didn’t. He. Did. Not.’ _ Dietrich prodded around some more and confirmed everything he did not want to know.  _ ‘That fucking bastard went off like a goddamn fire hydrant in me.’ _ He slipped his fingers out to hold his hole open for the fluid to flow out but life refused to let him off easy. he would have to stick his fingers back in, whirl them around and bring them out quickly to draw out all the fluids. 

So basically, he was fingering himself. And he’ll be damned if he gets turned on by this. But, of course, he did anyway. Low groans turned into loud moans and ragged breathing turned into broken pleas.

Pleas? What was he pleading for? it took him half a hot second until he  _ felt  _ himself calling for Ceres. there was no denying this one. “Whatever. _ Whatever _ . Just finish!” He needed more stimulation. He couldn’t remember anything from last night so he had to resort to fantasizing. he closed his eyes and convinced himself ceres was behind him. 

Two fingers became three. Then four. And then it was all white. Out with his hand came the remaining fluid. Dietrich collapsed in the tub and let the water clean up the new mess he’d made. It’s over. He won’t talk about it. It never happened. 

Dietrich left the bathroom a new man. He glanced at the unkempt bed and remembered Balzac’s order. the last time he followed balzac’s order he ended up– it’s over. it never happened. He threw the blanket aside and nearly destroyed the damn bed at first glimpse of the bed sheets. 

_ ‘Blood. gee I wonder where that came from. And it reeks of dried cum. Must be mine since Ceres doesn’t know what pulling out is. _ ’ He changed the sheets absentmindedly for the better and did a decent job for someone who couldn’t even stand up straight. He balled up the sheets and tossed them on the nightstand. There wasn’t a laundry basket anywhere in sight, and he tried to keep his movement to the minimal. Cere’s drape was left in the bathroom where it had fallen earlier. Ceres’s clothes were the least of his problems.

And now onto his uniform. strange. He'd been nude this whole time but he didn’t feel cold. guess like living in the ruins finally paid off. The uniform was unnecessarily complicated and it took him a few tries to figure out that like Ceres's uniform, a pin holds everything in place. 

His pin was a blue diamond with golden borders. It looked more like a boujee button than anything. His pants were form fitting, which is great for his supple ass, but today… today’s not the day to be wearing pants. He forced them on anyways and moved onto the new belt. Again, it took him a few tries to realize that it straps on itself rather than his shirt or pants. He latched his old belt to the back of his new one. every sexy lad has to have multiple belts. It’s as certain as the laws of physics. He unattached the book because it kept hitting the back of his thigh, and he had enough trouble walking already. 

He flipped through its pages; when had he filled up the whole book with notes? What  _ was  _ there to do today? Exploring the campus in  _ this  _ condition is incredibly far-fetched. He decided that he would find the library and study there for the remainder of the day. He planned on being promoted to a professor as quickly as possible. It would be wasted potential to make him the assistant to some talentless old man who didn’t bother coming to his banquet.

On his way out of Balzac's abode, he caught sight of Ceres's welcoming gift sitting exactly where it had been left on the dining table. After everything that’s happened in the past twelve hours, there’s no pride left to refuse his rival’s gift. Inside the brown box were more buttons probably used to adorn his uniform. But unlike the ones Balzac provided him, Ceres were overflowing with soul energy making them shine a true blue. 

What use did they have? None. Dietrich set them aside and took out the other item in the bag. It was a lavish maroon colored notebook.  _ And it didn’t even come with a pen. _

Dietrich refused to let himself jump to conclusions. It could just be that Ceres expected him to have his own pens. A single one of those things never seems to run out of ink anyways. And maybe also because the buffed up buttons were supposed to be the kill point of his gift but didn’t seem bulky enough so he added the book at the last minute.

Dietrich scoffed but quickly changed attitudes when he heard Balzac call his name from the corridor. “Oh you’re still here? I figured.” 

“Is there something you want, headmaster?” He would have to play nice until he got his promotion. Balzac was an interesting character anyways, even if he’s got bad ethics. Bad ethics are what makes him the loveable old man he is, in Dietrich’s opinion. 

“After last night, i’d figured you’d want the library to be brought to you so I got some students to fetch some books for you. They are some of the most talented life magic students in the academy, and i hope your meeting with them will go much smoother than it did with Ceres.” At the mention of that name, Dietrich choked on his own saliva. “In the meantime, what would you like for breakfast?”

“Actually, I think I can cook for myself. Thank you.” Dietrich would rather starve than let Balzac spike him up again. “Not that I know how to, but practical experience is the only way to improve.” 

“Haha! There’s the attitude I’m looking for! Alright, the whole kitchen is yours. Don’t make a mess in here too. I might just make you clean my whole house next time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're nearing the end


	8. chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> morris shenanigans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> q w q i need friends.

**(morris pov because who else would it be)**

The last time I've even seen a cutting board was when I was still a child with a family. And a knife? Those things are wack. I’d rather dice lettuce with my strings but apparently I've already used enough soul energy last night on  _ god knows what _ . 

_Shid, so what if I cut myself with these kitchen knives? My platelets are always on hyperdrive._ **_It’ll be ok, Dietrich, it’s just lettuce. One downward motion at a time; you have all day._**

He didn’t know where to hold the lettuce using his unarmed hand or why this shit was so hard in the first place.

_ Why did I start with the lettuce first anyways. What am i? Vegan?  _

**_If you can’t cut a fucking leaf, what makes you think you can cut a slab of meat._ **

_ I’m sick of this. I’m sick of having to wait for my soul energy to recover every time I blow it on something dumb. There has to be a more efficient way. _

**_It's great that you have ambitions and all but I’m just tryna eat._ **

_ Sometimes I wonder if I kill myself again, would it be able to get rid of these voices. _

**_Did it work the last two times? No? Didn’t think so either. Now make the damn sandwich already—_ **

“Excuse me, are you the new professor who needed the books delivered?”

Some white haired chick caught me off guard and I almost stabbed myself. Just proof that I don’t know how to hold a knife. But is she stupid? Like does she see anyone else in this room? Best life magic students my ass. “Assistant professor. Yes that’s me. Just leave them on the table, I’ll be right out.”

“My name is Clio Fournier! I look forward to your instruction, and my friend in the front is—”

“I didn’t ask. I’m trying to make a sandwich. Please leave me be.”

Clio glanced around until her eyes stopped on my lettuce. “You can’t make a sandwich without bread, sir. Now, I could help you make a  _ salad— _ ”

“No, really, get out. I won’t tell you again.”

“It was the headmaster’s order that we came to help you. He made it sound like you were seriously crippled or something. I’m sorry for the misunderstanding.”

Crippled huh? I’d rather be paralyzed from the waist down than walk with this pain in my—

**_Hey man, I thought we agreed to not bring that up anymore._ **

_ Oh shit you’re right— _

“Huh? Your face is all red, professor! What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” 

**_Yeah his ass got torn last night and I think he has nerve damage in this spine._ **

_ You JUST said not to bring this up. How the hell are we the same person? _

“Aosta! Aosta, help! I think he’s about to pass out or— ergh I don’t know, have a stroke or— just get your lazy ass over here  _ damn _ !” Her friend walked into the kitchen.

“If murder wasn’t a crime I would’ve already shot you, myself, and a few other students just for the high of it. Shooting myself first of course.” /a 

“Aosta, now’s not the time for your self-deprecating remarks.” /c

“You two are the best of the life magic students yet you guys can’t heal a simple stroke?” This has to be a joke. I didn’t expect the academy’s standards to be this low.

“See I knew he was having a stroke! I’m getting better at diagnosing people every day.” /c

“I wish I were having a stroke.” /a 

_ Is he… is he trying to flirt with her or is this a legitimate cry for help? _

**_Just let the troglodytes be, Dietrich. Just let them live their best lives._ **

“Don’t mind him. He’s just having a phase.” Clio slapped a hand in Aosta’s face and pushed him as far away as her short arms could manage. “But regarding what you said, we haven’t learned how to heal anything beyond physical cuts and burns.” 

“Your geezers are slacking then. I learned it by reading the runes once. I expect you to do the same.” I tried to cut my lettuce again. This knife gives me an idea. I overturned the knife and stabbed myself through my shirt. 

**_Couldn’t you have taken it off first?_ **

_ You want them to see those marks Ceres left on me?  _

**_They don’t know who it’s from though._ **

_ wHY don’t you give me sense bEfORe I make the decisions? Whatever, I’ll just ask for a new uniform or take a shirt from the guest room.  _

“PROFESSOR—?!” /c

“Mood.” /a

That guy needs some serious help. That can’t be considered as flirting anymore. “Heal me.” Clio and Aosta jointly casted a spell circle underneath me, and the wound sealed itself in a matter of seconds. “Hm, it’s not my technique but it works. Congratulations, you casted a newbie level spell. I’m proud. But if I were anybody else, I could’ve died of shock by the time you two realized the seriousness of the situation. I’m disappointed.”

“It’s okay, my parents were always disappointed in me anyways.” /a

“Aost— thank you for the small lesson today, professor… what is your name again?” /c

What a familiar question. “Dietrich. You’re dismissed. Leave.”

Eventually I would’ve made that sandwich. I sat for hours at that dinner table reading through the books. I was never a fan of acquired knowledge, alway relying on my own intellect, but even I have to admit these were enlightening. I marathoned through each and every single page, even the bibliography in memory of the nameless guy’s scolding. 

I glanced around to see if the coast was clear before summoning a spell circle and testing out the equations I've ingrained in my head. Most of them were for show and otherwise impractical, but it was interesting that they did not run off of soul energy. If I could combine these methods with my own technical expertise, I will undoubtedly make these arcane magic spells useful in a combat setting and overall more efficient. 

and then i’ll make the combatant more efficient. enhanced magic, I’ll call it. People with no natural ability are utterly useless without this kind of aid. But to the 1% who aren’t mentally crippled, enhanced magic will bring them near divinity. 

But life magic comes first. You talentless morons they take for professors, you’ve just met your redeemer.  _ Though, this is okay. Not everyone was meant to be like me _ . To disconnect my soul energy from my strings while maintaining the same power? Is that possible?  _ Of course it is. _ I just have to simplify and overlay a couple equations and it’ll be done. Just like that. It’s all in my technique. 

_ Technique, technique, technique— _

“So how late do you plan on staying up? And how long do you plan on sitting in one place?” Balzac stood before me, crossing his arms with an annoyingly stern expression. “Your shirt, how did it end up like that? What did I say about simulation battles and safety?”

“I stabbed myself while making a sandwich. Practical experience, you know?” I put my pencil down. A short break wouldn’t be that bad right now. “I was in deep thought until you so rudely interrupted. Is there something you need?” 

“For you to get out of my house, yeah.” Balzac snorted.  _ What kind of senior citiz— _ no, forget it. His limits don’t exist, quite obviously. “It’s almost midnight, you do realize that right?” I mumbled something that wasn’t supposed to resemble a yes or no. The flow of time means nothing to me anyways. “Your meeting with the two students went well I’m assuming?”

“More or less. If it’s one thing I learned from those two, it’s that I need to lower my expectations about the academy’s students.”

Balzac laughed at my remark. Finally! A guy who understands my humor, I mean not that it was a joke. “Alright, alright. You should leave for your dorm soon. Don’t worry about the books, I’ll make someone bring them back. Do you have all your belongings?”

I gathered my papers and stuffed them into my notebook. I think this is everything..? I glanced at Ceres’s gift. If he’s not here to see it, then it wouldn’t be bad to accept it. “Got ‘em.”

He scanned the area and raised an eyebrow. “And Ceres’s drape? You  _ are  _ returning that to him, no?”

“He can come retrieve it himself.”

“Well he wouldn’t know where you left it.”

“That’s not my problem.”

“Oh~! But it is! Although it’s a part of his uniform, it was last seen with you so it’s a shared responsibility among you two. You~ better~ go~ get~ it~.”

“How about I go fetch it and he comes get it? It can’t be a shared responsibility if I’m the only one putting in the work.”

“Damn it, Dietrich. How hard is it to walk into the bathroom and pick it off the floor where you left it?”

Because if I were to pop a squat or remotely lean over, I'd break what’s left of my spine, Balzac. we’re all at fault here. “ _ How the hell do you know that? _ ”

“I assumed, but now I do.” He smirked, the old,  _ clever  _ bastard. “Time’s’a tickin’. I want to get some sleep today. I had heard you two from my office last night, damn.” 

  
He just won’t let me live that down, huh? I went and painfully picked the wretched cloth off the floor then took my leave. The academy’s courtyard was empty as with everywhere else. With the amount of skill these students lack, I would  _ think _ they’d stay overtime to improve. 

_ Ah, but a hardworking monkey is still a monkey. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm a hardworking monkey...
> 
> not really lol no more updates, guys. this is the end. i wrote this last year instead of doing my summer assignments, and too many things have changed since then for this cursed thing to be revised and finished
> 
> but at least they did the do amirite ahshdghkgj

**Author's Note:**

> Did you make it to the end? I regret presenting this. I'm sorry 'v'


End file.
